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The stages of newly diagnosed children...I think I'm Angry. Yup, most certainly angry.

Discussion in 'Parents of Children with Type 1' started by JJsMomma, Oct 1, 2009.

  1. 2type1s

    2type1s Approved members

    Nov 23, 2008
    Wow...that so could have been written by me 10 years ago when Morgan was diagnosed....or 2 years ago...when Zoe was diagnosed. I hope that when you read this you realize that you are surrounded by cyber friends who really get it. There is a nature of dealing with chronically ill children that wears on parents. Even though we have a pretty good routine with the girls, there are always days and nights that something goes wrong. There is also the relentless thinking. I'm always thinking about carbs, basal rates, insulin, sites, sugar checks...every few hours, every day forever. No matter what anyone says, it does start to wear on you. I had this very conversation with one of my dearest friends this morning who has a daughter with spina bifida (who has to be catheterized every few hours to urinate). She feels the same way....it's always on her radar. We both felt "dissed" at work this week because I came in cranky because I had been up with both girls (one high, one low) much of the night. 2 of the girls joked about how cranky I was, and I was so pissed!!!! People just don't get it unless they live it. we roomed with some new friends at the beach this year, and they said MANY times "we had no idea you had to do all this". We should do something for Morgan and Zoe this year! (We've had 2 kids dx'd and cured of cancer in our group in the last 4 years, and have run marathons, had fundraisers, etc for them). I thought....wow...in 10 years no one has every thought that! (Because they only see us for a few hours at a time).
    One other poster recommended sending out an e-mail. I agree, but also include what your daily schedule is now. It will be an eye-opener.
  2. JJsMomma

    JJsMomma Approved members

    Sep 25, 2009
    Thank you SO much to everyone. I've had a nap yesterday and today and it is really amazing how a bit of sleep and comfort can alleviate a situation. LOVED all the ideas and suggestions (especially the one about pricking all my family members and doing a BG test...AWESOME! I'm going to get some saline and do test injections on them too, lol (insert diabolical laughter here)!!!!
  3. Jessies_Mom

    Jessies_Mom Approved members

    Aug 15, 2009
    You're not being overly dramatic at all!

    I remember feeling extremely frustrated and irritated with my family when they'd constantly ask over and over "So what's a high blood sugar?" or "What's a low blood sugar?" or "So will she have to do this stuff forever?".........Even after giving them printed hand outs. I was angry at the world and angry and jealous of other parents who didn't have to deal with the day to day diabetes stuff.

    You're feelings are normal and justified......hang in there and rant all you need!:)
  4. Mikker

    Mikker Approved members

    Feb 23, 2009
    I have a feeling we're going to become good friends... If you have any trouble getting ahold of some saline, I have some spare, sterile, 25ml syringes I can send that you can draw from. PM if needed. (insert diabolical laughter here) lol
  5. rebesser

    rebesser Approved members

    Oct 17, 2009
    My heart really goes out to you. I have had diabetes for 24 years, and was diagnosed aged 9. I believe that diabetes is hardest for parents. Your feelings are normal. You are allowed to be angry, but it won't take away the diagnosis. Please allow yourself some time.

    No one will ever really know what it feels like to be a parent, unless they are a parent, let alone a parent of child who has diabetes....no matter how many syringes you jab them with! I lived in blissful oblivion of what my parents were going through until I started working with children with diabetes and their families, as a paediatrician. Then when I realised, I couldn't believe it. I rang up my mum and told her I loved her, and thanked her for giving me strength and stability.
    There is light at the end of the tunnel, hang in there.

    best wishes,

  6. Omo2three

    Omo2three Approved members

    Jul 11, 2008
    You got that straight! Been there ....am there...done that...rant away sister...till you feel better.

    {{{{ HUGS!!**********

    IT stinks, and some will never get it or even try to get it...its just who they are. You are the mom and will do everything humanly possible to keep your baby healthy and safe.
    Its exhausting.... its tiring ...its unending....but always know its safe here.
    We do understand.
    And honestly it will get easier, as he grows..it will become the new norm.
  7. Barbzzz

    Barbzzz Approved members

    Jul 5, 2008
    You have every right to be angry, to vent and scream and shake your fist at the world. It's perfectly healthy. Not an overreaction whatsoever; as Becky (MamaC) said, it's just a reaction. Everyone has to find their own "coping" mechanism to deal with the apathy and indifference of people who should be there for you. For me, I write... I come here or over to Facebook and vent away or else I blog. We're very isolated here, no support groups to speak of and the only knowledge anyone has of diabetes is limited to type 2, because it's so prevalent here. My husband doesn't directly participate in Alex's care (though he will ask about her numbers/insulin), his family doesn't get it at all (nor do they try), and my family (with the exception of my mom) is too far removed to offer help, though I'll occasionally get a "thinking of Alex" email. Sadly, I get more compassion from strangers, it seems, like the lady at the Coca Cola depot who recalls in an instant that I'm there to buy Diet Coke for my diabetic 8 year old, and who asks how she is and says she's praying for a cure.

    I feel like the only real support I receive is from you all. I'm angry too, but I accept that the way things are is the way things are and I get past it. All I can hope for are minor victories and lots of patience.

    ((HUGS)) You've had a rough month, but it will get better. And we're here to support you in any way that we can. If you come on over to the dark side (Facebook) you'll find a lot of us there (I'm Barbara Bulin Zigah).

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