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Super Frustrated!

Discussion in 'Parents of Children with Type 1' started by BellasMom, Nov 30, 2009.

  1. cmsullivan

    cmsullivan Approved members

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    Hey Meagan!
    I don't really have any great words of advice for you, Leland has no concept of "sneaking food" since he is only 2 but I am sure it is very frustrating. I know how hard you work to keep her healthy and the diabetes under control, It must feel like a slap in the face that she is in a way rebeling against her circumstances. Maybe you two could have a "mommy and me" day and do something special with her to help her relax a bit and then talk to her about how important it is for her to let you know what she eats so that it can be covered with some insulin. I better run for now it sounds like the boys are taking apart the Christmas tree LOL. (((((HUGS))))) for you friend!
    Carrie
     
  2. Toni

    Toni Banned

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    We were only on Lantus and Novolog a few months but were trained to use it as "the poor man's pump." We counted carbs, Novolog for everything she ate, basal tested the Lantus. I would ask the endo if your daughter can be trained to use MDI in this manner. We have figured out a way to make the limitations of D fit into E's lifestyle. Breakfast, lunch and afternoon snack are spaced out, as is dinner. She eats most carbs after school and in the evenings. Huge afternoon snack, large dinner (in which we overbolus) so she can have an extra snack an hour and a half to two hours after dinner. If she is "sneaking" food she is hungry. Or you have not figured out a way to match her eating habits to the insulin, not vice-versa. In this house, flexibility does not mean you can eat whatever, wherever or eat all day. But we identify when it is she craves to eat (after school, evenings) and figure out her eatting pattern, work to match that up with insulin as close as possible. If your child really likes to graze all the time, you will have to figure out a way (look up Wilf's posts). There is a book "Sweet Kids" that kind of addresses this topic, though not completely. Wilf's posts re overbolusing for snacks, together with this book, should help.
     
  3. shekov

    shekov Approved members

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    I'm so sorry you are dealing with this.

    I didn't see anywhere how old your dd is but if she's at that preteen/teen super emotional phase (we are in it now) it just adds to the problem.

    I think a therapist is a great idea and unless your dd is over 18, she doesn't get to choose whether or not she goes, YOU DO.

    Hang in there. You've gotten some great advice. See what works for your family.
     
  4. Toni

    Toni Banned

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    Reading further and noting that your daughter does want to eat but is "not interested in taking any insulin right now", may be an indication that she really does want to eat but does not want that shot. On MDI, E. did not seem to mind (we used Novolog pen) but, once pumping, she now does not like shots. If you don't want to pump, there is a device called "insulflon catheter". It would be like a pump site. You would insert every three days. All shots would go into the catheter. Personally, I think insulin shots would be less invasive. Something called the I-Port, also, but I-Port has had a lot of bad reviews. I would start investigating pumps just to familiarize myself with them if she continues to eat without accepting the shots.
     
  5. denise3099

    denise3099 Approved members

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    Just my 2 cents, and I'm not bashing MDI--sure you can eat what and when you want on MDI, but then you need a shot. If that's the problem, then yes a pump is the answer. You both may not be interested but you do need to check it out because if shots are the problem, a pump is the answer.

    She may also just want to eat like a "normal" person and not have to think about D every time she has a cracker--understandable. you may have to take back some control of D care and give the kid a break--she might be genreally overwhelmed and this is her way or expressing that. I agree that "it ends now", but that means that for the time being you have to do everything, at least until she's more compliant.

    btw, my non-D 9 yr old was sneaking snacks. i'd find wrappers to choc ceral bars in the pantry, among other evidence of snacking. it's not just that he was hungry, it was that he knew I wouldn't let him have 5 chocolate ceral bars! Kids do that, so try not to make a big deal out of it. Just let her know that if she doesn't want shots, she needs a pump, but she will not snack without you knowing about it and giving her insulin for it. good luck.

    How old is she? I like to treat D exhaustion with accesories. A new Medical bracelet, a new meter skin, new lancets in different colors that are thin, new D bag in soemthing other than black. Even new books about it or dolls and toys. go to amazon and search Loy diabetes. The loy borthers have 2 great books and the mom has one for parents. the are very positive and "fun"
     
  6. BellasMom

    BellasMom Approved members

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    Thanks for this Lisa... I think the carbs are a craving. Out of all of my children she's the carbo loader and would always go for bread or sweets before fruits and veggies. I am a Nutritionist. I am also a Holistic Health Care practitioner. I know I don't look at food the way a lot of people do. We didn't have sugar in the house before Isabelle was diagnosed and we don't now. I do use other natural non artificial sweeteners and we have our fair share of goodies...so it's really not about that. We also abide by the rule that everybody has the same thing. I do allow her to go to parties and calculate for cake..etc. I do not have my own issues with food, and maybe that's part of it? I do think it is about control. I think it's even hard that it is also the child that is so much like me in personality. We had a long talk last night and I really like what you said about me not letting her hurt herself. That's perfect. We also talked about the pump and she is still adamant she does not want it. She doesn't care about the shots so much...I just think it's control and anger over not being able to eat without thinking about it. I also think you are right about not feeling her highs. She is still honeymooning, but there it seems like some days her pancreas says here I am working hard and she's low for no reason..then the next day..oh I'm burnt out from yesterday and corrections don't seem to work..I don't know..it's frustrating. She was perfect today: BG's have been 84, 92, 94, 102 & 104! She was proud and I made sure she knew I was too. I asked her how she felt compared to yesterday and she said better. I did also email my local chapter of JDRF and they've put me in touch with a lady that seems to have a lot in common with myself and has a great teenager that has been T1 since 9. I am scheduling a phone call with her and also hoping her daughter can talk to mine and we can form a bond with the people around us. We only have one other kid in her school that is D and his parents don't participate in a lot of his health care according to the staff. I think we are on the right track and I thank you all for your support!

    Thanks Carrie! We need to talk soon! Hope the tree is ok!

    Meg
     
  7. wilf

    wilf Approved members

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    A possibility to think about is acquiring some Regular, and giving her a couple of units every 3 hours after school. She would have to cover the insulin with "x" amount of carbs, or she'd go low.

    But you could let her decide which carbs and within reason when to have them. Gives her lots of control and responsibility, and doesn't have you in the role of the D Police.. :cwds:
     
  8. StillMamamia

    StillMamamia Approved members

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    I still think the "my kids don't eat the sugars" issue needs to be addressed.
    "Sugars", as you call them, are in so many things, and it's not necessarily a bad thing.
    For me "sugars" are:
    bread
    pasta
    rice
    lentils
    chickpeas
    beans
    cereals
    some cheeses
    yoghurt
    milk
    fruit
    certain vegies
    etc
    etc etc

    Honey is also used sometimes in my house.
    Sugar (white or brown) will be used for baking birthday cakes, but obviously is not eaten by the spoon.
    We don't use maple syrup or any other syrup, for that matter, but that's because we don't eat pancakes and stuff like that (DH and the kids don't like those).
    Sweets are allowed sometimes, in small quantities.
    Nothing is forbidden, but everything is allowed, in moderation and with an awareness of what each food does.
     
  9. amberdawn33

    amberdawn33 Approved members

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    Oh I feel your pain! My 9 year-old daughter was diagnosed almost a year ago and she was honeymooning for a long while. She just started on the pump in October and now since school has started she has started "hoarding" food. Normally she goes into the kitchen and gets a "free" snack - 15 carbs or less - after school. Lately though she has been having really high blood sugars in the evening and we noticed loads of snacks disappearing. We had a new box of granola bars and there were 5 gone the other day in one day!!! Then a 400 blood glucose!!!! I was sooo mad!! I dont mind her having a free snack or bolusing for a higher carb snack but 5 granola bars? come on! I have read other posts on CWD and talked to another mom with a teenage son with type I and I have seen that lots of kids go through this. I dont know if its rebellion or hormones or what it is. I am not home for about an hour after school and my teenage son is here with her and he is struggling trying to monitor her snack intake. Truthfully, I had to put the snacks up and only leave one out for her or she can ask for one. I know locking it up is harsh but it had to be done for her own good. I also had a good heart-to-heart talk with her about her behavior. I told her that we needed to be on the "same team" - both concerned about her blood sugars. She agreed and I think things are getting better but it is always a struggle. D isn't ever perfect and neither are we or our kids. Just hang in there and do a lot of praying. Thats what I've done. :)
     
  10. heamwdevine

    heamwdevine Approved members

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    I agree with just letting her have what she would like after school and covering it with insulin. The pens are great for this. My daughter will actually want a shot so she can have something that she wants. She is on the pump now so it's not an issue, but even before the pump she would do this after school, and as I learned more, I realized she needed an extra shot to cover that after school time when we were on a more strict NPH/Humalog schedule.

    She was also diagnosed in February. Good Luck! It is hard, but if we try to put the "control" back in theirs hands just a tiny bit I think they feel better. FYI, my daughter would "sneak" food as well before we finally just started covering with another shot when she wanted something.
     
  11. PamB

    PamB Approved members

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    sneaking A LOT of food

    I am suffering the same problem. My daughter (12) is sneaking snacks and hiding the empty containers in her bedroom. If it was only a couple things here and there, and she bolused for it, I wouldn't worry about it at all. I have talked with her about this and expressed that it is unnecessary to hide the refuse and my preference that the containers be disposed of in the garbage - where they belong. However, last night while I was cooking dinner, she snuck into the pantry and took 6 snack cups of applesauce and then went into her room and ate all of them! I had no idea until this morning when I went to grab an applesauce for her and they were all gone but 2!
     
  12. frizzyrazzy

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    Has she said why she's taking these items?
     
  13. BellasMom

    BellasMom Approved members

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    Hello, I'm the original poster on this thread...so I've been there! Isabelle used to do the same thing. She was always pretty good about hiding the fact that she had food at the time, but never good about hiding the evidence. She doesn't do this any more. I do believe it was anger from being diagnosed and then wanting some kind of control over her own body. The best thing was to have her in contact with an older girl with D and she helped her to see how important taking care of herself is. It always seems to come better from a non-parent =)

    She has a pump now and the sneaking had stopped long before we got it, however it is the best thing EVER!!! I remember watching an episode of 20/20 way before she was diagnosed and they talked about a lady that was so severe she had to have an insulin pump...so that put me in the mindset that the pump was a negative thing. I'm so glad I listened to other Moms and did the research. I highly recommend it. Isabelle is to the point where she freaks out if she has to have a shot...she loves her pump.
     
  14. Blue

    Blue Approved members

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    Thank you for telling us about the happy ending! :cwds:
     

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