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Separate meters?

Discussion in 'Parents of Children with Type 1' started by coni, Apr 16, 2011.

  1. coni

    coni Approved members

    Mar 23, 2006
    If you were sharing parenting time with a former spouse, would it be okay for you to have separate meters?

    My child's father has informed me that he just purchased a separate meter so the meter doesn't have to travel back and forth. There has been no problem that I am aware of doing this.

    I may be over-reacting and worrying too much, but DD has been anywhere from 69 to 520 in his household in the past 48 hours. I've also had some trouble in the past getting information about DD from him when in his care, although I hope it is just forgetfulness and not intentional.

    What do you think?
  2. kimmcannally

    kimmcannally Approved members

    Feb 28, 2010
    We use three different meters. (all in the same household)
    I love having access to a meter wherever I am instead of having to search for one. And J keeps a meter in his backpack for going places.
    If you use any of these meters:

    Bayer - Ascensia Contour, Breeze2
    Roche - Accu-Chek Aviva, Compact Plus
    LifeScan - OneTouch Ultra, Ultra2, UltraSmart, UltraMini/UltraEasy, Ping
    Abbott - Freestyle Mini, Freestyle Flash, Freestyle Freedom, Freestyle Freedom Lite, Freestyle Lite, Precision Xtra

    you can use diasend uploader and it will put all the info from all the meters into one database. We get to use it free with Animas paying the fee. I don't know how much they charge if you don't pump.
  3. Ed2009

    Ed2009 Approved members

    Mar 3, 2009
    Definitively not, and here's why I think that:

    Meters show the average for the last 7-14-30 days, which gives you a good idea how is the big picture doing: If the 7days avrg is better than the 14 days one, you're controlling alright.

    So separate meters will disrupt the average.

    Plus, I sometimes look backwards to see what happen 2 days ago when we had this or that for dinner. This information is not available if meters are separate.

    Now, if you have like Kimmc. the chance to download all data to one single place, that's a different story.
  4. Nancy in VA

    Nancy in VA Approved members

    Jul 16, 2007
    If you think that he is not being honest about her readings (someone else on this board had trouble with dishonesty with an ex-spouse) then I would insist the meter go back and forth so you can see the actual readings instead of "logged" which may or may not be true.

    If he is trustworthy, then I think its fine to have 2 sets of everything so things don't have to be passed back and forth
  5. hawkeyegirl

    hawkeyegirl Approved members

    Nov 15, 2007
    It's not exactly the same situation, but my kids spend a fair amount of time at my parents' house. (They babysit them while I work, and usually spend one weekend night there.) They have their own meter as a back-up, but we have one main meter that goes back and forth. Really, it's not that big of a deal to just hand them the meter case when I drop him off.

    In your shoes, I'd prefer one main meter.
  6. KatieSue

    KatieSue Approved members

    Oct 5, 2010
    Now we're on the omnipod obviously it's the meter so it goes with her but previously we had one meter that went with her. It was easier to keep track of everything. Esp at her Dads as he tends to not pay attention to whether she tests or not and I can figure out what's happened by looking at the meter.

    Co-parenting isn't easy.
  7. wilf

    wilf Approved members

    Aug 27, 2007
    If it were me I'd insist on one meter. Each household should have a back-up meter, but it should only be used when needed. There is huge value in having one meter showing weekly and monthly meter averages, as well as a continuous record of BG measurements.

    That having been said, I'd be careful about being judgmental if the meter which is traveling back and forth shows things not being run the same as you'd run them at the other household.

    Everyone has their own way of managing the D, and your way is not necessarily the right way (even if the meters shows you have better numbers)..
  8. skimom

    skimom Approved members

    Jan 16, 2008
    It is great that he has another meter in his house - that certainly ensures that one is available. I think that you need to look at this as a positive - that he understands the importance of availability of the meter. I would ensure that his spare meter is checked against the lab so you are sure that its readings are accurate enough . I would want the primary meter to be the one that travels with my child, however back up is great. Another idea would be for there to be a log that travels - that way dad can fill in numbers from which ever meter is finally used but you still get the info you need. It might also allow him to see trends etc . Although I don't live your situation, I think its important that you look for the positive in this-in his own way, your childs father is taking some interest in D - with some gentle encouragement from you and your child , it will go the direction you want.
  9. Lee

    Lee Approved members

    Oct 5, 2006
    Well - as a single-parent who splits custody 50/50, we have one meter that goes back and forth - and many spares.

    When downloading a meter, it is important to have a complete picture on what the blood sugar has been doing - at moms, at dads, at school, at friends! Everywhere!

    Also, you really can't judge what the #'s were at dad's versus your place. He will take care of your child differently then you will. My ex and his wife used to persecute me for having higher #'s - come to find out, we both measured carbs differently - I would carefully weigh everything and he would eyeball. We eventually set-up different Lantus and Carb ratios for each house to combat the differences. Now that she measures her own carbs, the discrepancy has vanished.

    Judging #'s from parent to parent leaves you feeling paranoid - I know - as both a judger and a judgee.

    As a judger - I find myself in a constant state of worry and panic about him not testing her at night and not knowing how to deal with bad highs.

    As a judgee - I used to keep a spreadsheet of every bs test. I would download it every week, mark if the # happened at my house or dad's, decide if it was out of range and figure out average bs, average # of highs, average # of lows, avg # of carbs. etc, etc, etc. The #'s couldn't lie and we were always within 5 -10 % of each other. I started bringing these spreadsheets to the Endo and finally he yelled at us for 2 hours about how we have to stop judging hte other household. What happens at mom's is mom's business and what happens at dad's is dads business - kwim Life os so much happier now without that hanging over my head.

    It is tough and it sucks - but as a single mom who has been dealing with 2 households and Type 1 for over 5 years, that is my best piece of advice.
  10. AlisonKS

    AlisonKS Approved members

    May 16, 2007
    we do this too with my inlaws, just in case!
  11. Flutterby

    Flutterby Approved members

    Nov 11, 2006
    We don't have to deal with the ex issue.. but I would think it would be easier to just have one main meter. He can have a spare, incase something goes wrong, but I know for my child, it would be a total pain to be using a different meter at another house. She knows her meter is in her bag, I wouldn't want to mess with that and have it somewhere else while she's at dad's house.
  12. Blue

    Blue Approved members

    Aug 19, 2010
    We have a CWD that travels between two households . . . If you are worried about the other households integrity then one meter or two doesn't really matter. We found out the hard way (an A1C that was four points higher than the meter averages!) that if one parent doesn't want you to know the "real" numbers then you won't know them even if there is only one meter that travels back and forth.

    Good luck.
  13. bnmom

    bnmom Approved members

    Oct 26, 2010
    Does your ex also have a complete stockpile of supplies? If not, then the meter traveling back and forth is just part of the package of goodies that go with your child. Even if he does...I gave my ex a complete set of supplies for back up, but that's what it is - strictly for back up.

    Regardless, I personally wouldn't feel comfortable with my ex keeping a separate meter. When the boys come home from visitation, I scroll through the meter to see how Bobby's numbers went that weekend...if dad had another meter, I'd never know.

    My ex has a very basic understanding of D, but it falls on me to identify and explain troubleshooting...and he never calls me while the boys are there...so it's when I scroll through the meter when they get home that we have that conversation to address any potential issues.

    Good luck to you! I know how divorce visitation can throw an extra cog in the D wheel :cwds:

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