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Pondering....warning: long.

Discussion in 'Parents of Children with Type 1' started by lynn, May 16, 2011.

  1. lynn

    lynn Approved members

    Sep 2, 2006
    A couple of my kids and I were talking the other day about diabetes. My 13-year-old was wondering how ketones worked. How dka worked. That sort of thing. I told them the story of my friend's daughter who nearly didn't live to diagnosis because she was throwing up and the ped's office kept telling her mom that it was the stomach virus that was going around at that time and it took several days to shake it. Finally she was helping her four-year-old (at that time) into clean jammies again and noticed just how skinny she had become. She insisted on an appointment and when the doctor walked into the room he didn't even have to test her--he smelled the ketones. The doctor told that mom later that her daughter wouldn't have made it to the next day if she hadn't brought her in.

    We were discussing how shocking it is that diabetes is still so underdiagnosed--at least in a timely fashion. I've never talked like this with my older kids. Nathan was not very sick at diagnosis--no ketones and no hospitalization.

    That conversation has been bouncing around my head in quiet times since.

    Tonight my 10-year-old is throwing up. A lot. A whole lot.

    I do not think she has diabetes.

    My mind is thinking though...if this WAS the dramatic onset of diabetes (like my friend's daughter experienced) what sort of effect would it have on her? How would she handle it in comparison to Nathan? Diagnosis as a 10-year-old girl would be WAY different than diagnosis as a two-year-old boy. I would worry about an eating disorder, to be honest.

    Why am I blabbing on about this? What is my point? I'm not sure exactly. Maybe I am wondering if you all have thought about how diabetes would affect your other children? What would be the battles for them?

    To be honest, I have mostly considered how another diagnosis would affect ME. That's embarrassing to admit, but it's reality.
  2. wilf

    wilf Approved members

    Aug 27, 2007
    I guess my approach to life is such that I do not spend any time at all thinking about stuff like this - I deal with challenges as they come, but don't spend a lot of time worrying about possible challenges.. :cwds:
  3. Lize

    Lize Approved members

    Jul 14, 2010
    I do not think a second diagnosis will be as hard to accept...
  4. GaPeach

    GaPeach Approved members

    Dec 29, 2007
    Yes, I think about this subject. Our DD was in severe DKA at dx. I never want to be there again.

    Two of our non-d children have been identified as high risk for d in the TrialNet/Panda study. If they get a stomach virus, I check BG and ketones. It's not an obssessive thing, but rather a cautious measure.

    As far as a second dx, I hope we never face it. However, the non-d children are active in the d routine. They attend JDRF meetings, Friends For Life conference, and diabetes day-camp. They "notice" when their older sister is acting different because of d and get her to check her bg. They once shared a bedroom with her and would let us know if the pump alarmed at night.

    A second dx would be disappointing but not devestating. We have seen God's promise fulfilled that "all things work for good to them that love God and are called to His purpose". Even in d, we have found blessings.
  5. StillMamamia

    StillMamamia Approved members

    Nov 21, 2007
    This crosses my mind sometimes when my youngest is drinking tons or peeing a lot or having those tantrums like my oldest did pre-dx. I then check his BG and move on.

    I don't know how I'd deal with a second dx. Probably shock, sadness and quick acceptance.
  6. bibrahim

    bibrahim Approved members

    Jan 31, 2011
    I think about it for my older daughter and also my neices and nephews. I hope it doesn't happen but hopefully we will know sooner and avoid DKA also. That was so scary and shocking. I still think about it sometimes and get that pit in my stomach. Thankfully no more DKA and she is doing well on her pump.

    My older daughter joined our family through adoption and is not in the trial net study. So far no big health problems in her birth family (other than lots of ADHD). She has been a big support for us in many ways. There was an adjustment period where she didn't get why we freaked out on lows...she was right...good to get some perspective from your teenager.;)
  7. MamaTuTu

    MamaTuTu Approved members

    Apr 1, 2011
    I worry about this with my son. It would break my heart all over again especially because of his age. Isabella was Dx @ 18 mo. its not easy for us and especially because of her age but at the same time Im kinda relieved that it happened at such a young age because she will grow up never knowing any different...
  8. DsMom

    DsMom Approved members

    Nov 9, 2010
    I think about this often. Of course, the technical and management part would be a breeze the second time around, but my heart would break just the same as it did for Daniel if another of my kids was dx. I've often felt that, of my 3 kids, Daniel was the best "equipped" to handle this dx. He is sunny, optimistic, and more easy going than my other 2. He is also NOT a picky eater like the others, making the nutrition part of management probably easier. My older son is more negative and he dwells on things if they go badly for him--D would be much harder for him. My daughter is a perfectionist and a worrier--maybe good for D management, but bad for D worries. Because I have a niece who was dx 25 years after her big sister was dx as a toddler, I know this is a worry that is here to stay...but I try to pull myself away from it when I find myself dwelling on it. Right now, there is nothing I can do to prevent it...so I try to let it go quickly when it pops into my head.
  9. tiger7lady

    tiger7lady Approved members

    Sep 14, 2010
    I also think about this a lot with my daughter. For the past year every time she has come down with a stomach bug I have checked her blood sugar. But I try not to dwell on it. I know that if it does happen I will be much better prepared to deal with it. Will I be upset and sad, of course, but I will know how to handle it.
  10. quiltinmom

    quiltinmom Approved members

    Jun 24, 2010
    We have a stomach bug going around our house, too, and the thought of it being D crossed my mind at first. I try not to spend much time worrying about another child getting D (as much as I can); if it happens, it happens and there's not much I can do about it. That said, I have wondered what it would be like if another child wsa DXed, how different it would be, how it would change the family dynamic, etc. I definitely think a second DX would be easier in a LOT of ways, unless it was the baby. D in a young child would be new for me. But it would be a new set of challenges no matter which child it was.

    I think it's practically impossible to not wonder if another child will be DXed. But I try not to dwell on it or worry about it. I will test another child once in a while (my 3 year old ASKED to test his blood the other day! weird) but I don't think it's out of panic. For me, I test because I can, because it gives an answer, another piece to a puzzle, without which I would actually worry more. I guess I don't feel the need to shield my others from the possibility of a diagnosis. I echo what GaPeach said. There's a sliver lining to every cloud.
  11. Ashti

    Ashti Approved members

    Sep 4, 2007
    That reminds me of the quote...

    My life has been full of terrible misfortunes most of which never happened.
    -- Michel de Montaigne
  12. monkeyschool

    monkeyschool Approved members

    Mar 2, 2011

    I was thinking about this the other day...actually discussing with my DD because she brought it up. We came to the conclusion that if it had been her siblings instead of her we'd be doomed. The others eat like bottomless pits anytime, anywhere. Can never get a balanced diet to happen. My son gags at the thought of a vegetable or a fruit and survives purely on carbs. It would be very difficult to manage D with them.

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