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One week ago today...

Discussion in 'Parents of Children with Type 1' started by BlakesDad, Apr 23, 2010.

  1. BlakesDad

    BlakesDad Approved members

    Apr 22, 2010
    This is our story, probably similar to yours but I have to get it out.


    One week ago today, April 15th, my ten year old son Blake was diagnosed with Type 1. The night before I had looked up the symptoms he was having due to my fiance naming diabetes as a possibility. Definitely was symptoms of Type 1. It was a very calm, yet strange feeling I had. Somehow I knew that's what it was, yet it was not that big of a deal to me. I knew D was manageable so I thought things would be ok.

    Fiance and I were supposed to go out of town for a conference the next morning for three days so I thought I would just take him one day the following week to see the doctor. I called for an appt and explained symptoms and needless to say, they wanted to see him same day. So ok, all is cool, I check him out of school and take him. I knew in my mind he had it, yet i was very calm and relaxed with it.

    They checked for keytones (which I had no idea at the time what they were) and evidently he had alot. They checked his sugar, said their machines would read up to 600 and since the machine said "HI", it was over 600. I had no idea what normal was so I wasnt that concerned. I mean, he acted fine on this day. Seemed a little pale maybe, was tired, but man, he had had colds that got to him worse than this.

    So I am thinking, ok so what now? We take shots? we do this we do that, I had no idea, therefore i was still in control. Blake was upset and scared and I cant blame him. I remember when they pricked his finger and checked it, I asked "So, we will need to do that what, once or twice a day?" I was quickly told no, it would be 6-8 times a day and once or twice in the middle of the night. Now that started to get my attention. That scared me. Kind of showed me the seriousness of it. Yes, i teared up, but tried to stay strong for my son.

    So they next mention the hospital, once again I am thinking basically a 3-5 hour ER visit. Was i wrong... He mentioned being admitted, so I made the statement "Ah ok, so we gotta spend the night over there?", Doc said, no, you will spend 4-7 days over there and he explained how serious it was and how close to (insert some big word he said...ketosis??) and how close to ICU we were. Then I was scared. 3 hours later we were admitted and finally after 6 days, we came home.


    And now here I am, we been home two days. I will be honest, i am still scared to death about this. its been one week today. I feel like I have so much weight on my shoulders, which I know you all do too, but will it ever be lifted? I have tried for so long to be strong, for him, his mother (we are divorced), his sister, my fiance and for everyone. I have yet to really really cry over this. As I type I feel like I may finally let loose (edit: I did cry, while typing this but feel as if I held in). Its almost 1130 at night, everyone's asleep and I am up doing this, but I have to get it out somewhere.

    He is handling it very very well. He has not been upset about it since they quit drawing blood every two hours the first night we were there. Tonight he was actually able to play in his first baseball game since since missing two. I coach his team and basically put trust in him to tell me how he felt since he does recognize when he gets low. I have got to figure out how many extra carbs to give during a game cause rt before game we were at 205, after 2 innings we were down to 118 which worried me so between that time and the end of game we took in 27g. Well we went straight to eat and then rt before we ate, his BS had spiked to 247. Of course we corrected it and countered his supper carbs but then we get home (ate out) and do his bedtime check and its at 77. Another juice and 20 minutes later its at 130. has been being 190 at bedtime. Everything was basically fine since we had come home until tonight.

    Im sorry this is so long and I have so many questions that i wont even begin to ask them now. I am sure I rambled and skipped around and everything but I have always had an "answer" or "fix" to everything for my family and for once in my life, I don't. I guess with time I will figure out the carb trick for baseball/football and basketball. I guess also with time, i will learn to live with what he has and we will know basically what to do in each situation. but for now, I just need someone else I can lean on.

    My fiance has been great in helping me out, no doubt. Been there for me and for him, but I try to stay strong in front of her but she does know how its getting to me. Im sorry this is so long, and I know so many of you have or have had the same feelings/situation I am going through. If you read it, thank you and if you skipped to the end, well that's cool too.

    Its just not fair....
  2. lauraqofu

    lauraqofu Approved members

    Apr 19, 2010
    Oh, my. I'm so sorry you and your son are going through this. My daughter was diagnosed on Sunday night, so I know what you mean about not understanding, and being overwhelmed with what to do to correct high sugars or low sugars.

    You're right, it isn't fair, kids should have the chance to just be kids.
  3. lynn

    lynn Approved members

    Sep 2, 2006
    I'm so, so sorry that your son was diagnosed. I'm glad you found us here because we are a family who sticks together and holds each other up when needed.

    I remember well the feelings that came after diagnosis. They lessen. You will learn so much in the next few months that you will probably dream carbs and blood sugar numbers. Give yourself permission to take the time to mourn the loss of your son's healthy and care-free future. He can still be healthy but the care-free part will take some work---which sort of loses the whole care-free thing;)

    Please post all of the questions you have. We have some awesome, knowledgeable people around here who are always willing to help.

    Take care, dad. Life will be happy again.
  4. wilf

    wilf Approved members

    Aug 27, 2007
    I'm really glad you found us so soon. Sorry to hear about your son's diagnosis. I know what you mean about needing to be strong, and you do. But you can't always be strong so make sure you find the time and space to just let it all out. It's ok to be sad. It passes, but that takes time.

    If you need support or advice, we're here. :) And if you just need to chat with people who "get it" we're also here. It's a pretty tight community.. :cwds:
  5. Flutterby

    Flutterby Approved members

    Nov 11, 2006
    Sorry to hear of your son's diagnoses.. glad you found us so quickly.. You WILL find a 'normal' again.. it won't be the same as before, things have changed, but it WILL get better, I promise.. the first weeks, months, year is hard.. there is just so much to learn and remember.. it will become second nature..

    I encourage you to find a support group for both yourself (and any other family member that wishes toattend) and one for your son, Blake.. Kids LOVE to see that they aren't the only ones..

    And I totally agree.. its NOT fair..
  6. CassiesMama

    CassiesMama Approved members

    Jan 17, 2010
    Welcome to the mix. So glad that you found CWD. This is one of the best places I found after my daughters dx. Some of the best people I could have ever hoped to run across. They have given me advice when I have been lost in the D roller coaster. Thanks to the people here they have made it easier, and I hope by finding this site and these people it makes your sons dx, just a little bit easier for you and him.
  7. tesa

    tesa Approved members

    Mar 4, 2009
    Welcome, Blake's Dad. Reading your story brings back that raw emotion and helplessness that most of us have felt. It will get better. You will learn so much and do all you can to help your son. This forum saved my sanity. I have learned so much here as will you. Any questions, feel free to post or even do a search, there is a lot of great advice and help for you here.

    Welcome to the club you do not want to belong to, but everyone here understands what you are going through. I am glad you posted your story, you needed to get that out. You are on your way. :cwds:
  8. NatBMomto4

    NatBMomto4 Approved members

    Mar 24, 2010
    I am so sorry about your son's dx, but I am so happy that you found CWD so soon! My son was diagnosed on March 15, less than a month before his 12th birthday. I won't lie and tell you it gets easier - it really hasn't for me. But there are "stages" to the grief I felt - that initial devastation and crying all the time has passed (now I only cry once or twice a week:eek:)

    I find it best to take each day one at a time. There are good days and bad days. There are new things to learn and new challenges every day. D is not a "black and white" disease, so just when you think you have it figured it, everything changes. My son plays baseball, too. He is on his Middle school's team and also plays Little League. Physical activity really affects his bs a lot, and it has taken us a while to figure out how many carbs to give him. His bs drops a lot, like your sons. We have him drink Gatorade throughout, and snack. There is a lot of trial and error involved, and a LOT of time on the phone with our endo's office! They still want me to call them every day to give them his #'s! It is time-consuming and exhausting - but my son is getting to do what he LOVES (baseball) despite D, so it is worth it to me.

    This website has been my lifeline. I have learned so much, and connected to some amazing parents. We don't know anyone else with T1, so having these parents to share with has helped more than I can say.

    Good luck, and keep coming back to CWD!
  9. Java

    Java Approved members

    May 15, 2008
    (((((HUGS))))) It is really scary at first and I would be lieing if I said I do not get scared from time to time. But things do get easier. You will go through lows and see you did handle it and you will have high for no reason and you will just correct it. The best thing I can tell you is our children have this diease and we can do everything right and things still fall apart. You are doing great. So glad you found us.

    Be careful in correcting a high after exercise. The high will usually come down on it on. Make sure to keep an extra close eye on blood sugars at night after a day of heavy excerise.
  10. Gracie'sMom

    Gracie'sMom Approved members

    Aug 26, 2009
    It is a lot of weight on your shoulders. I can't say that goes away with time or really even lessens by much, but I guess you get used to it. You'll forget about it for brief moments of time until something reminds you. You will get used to all of this, it will become normal to you, although it never gets easy. Your son will be ok and so will you. The blessings are he is at a great age to understand this, help with his care, and deal with it and hopefully learn things before he hits puberty and all that goes with it. This is a great place to come, people in your life will try to understand you, but they just don't. Only others going thru the same thing will get how you feel. Hang in there!
  11. VinceysMom

    VinceysMom Approved members

    Mar 3, 2010
    Blakesdad - you are not alone in this journey, we have all felt the way you feel. I was a complete disaster for 2 full weeks if not more... You sort of go through the "grieving process" and then all of a sudden you find that you are moving forward, but it does take time. I still cry, too. We all understand here what you are going through.

    My son is 14, diagnosed in December. It is definitely a learning process, and once you think you figured it out, something changes again:cwds: That's how this disease is.

    Please come back here often for support and post any questions you have. This site has been a lifesaver to me. So many great suggestions, so many knowledgeable people.

    Take care of yourself, you WILL be able to do this. You are an awesome Dad and your little buddy needs you.

    All the best, Kathy
  12. Kayla and Ethan's Mom

    Kayla and Ethan's Mom Approved members

    Aug 18, 2009
    Hi and welcome to, what I think, is sanity! Your dx story brought tears to my eyes, as they all do. Your right, it's not fair! But this is what life has handed your son and your family. It's hard, especially at first when your trying to learn everything and you get no break from it. You will find though, that soon it will be "normal" and not feel so foreign. For now, remember that you are learning, you will make mistakes and it will take time to figue out what makes lows, highs, and what exercise does to your son. Everyone is different, so you will have learn this stuff by trial and error. This site is the BEST place to come for advice, information, support or to just vent. We all understand what your talking about and most can certainly relate. You'll need that. I'm so glad you came here and posted so soon, it took me a few months. Good luck!:)
  13. momof2here

    momof2here Approved members

    Apr 7, 2009

    Welcome Blake's Dad and I am sorry that you have to be here but glad you found your way.

    It is a very rough road - for some it is easier than others but it gets easier than the beginning for sure. I think the way in which you perceived the situation, with a sense of calm and peace, initially, will serve you well as you continue your lives after the diagnosis. You are already seeking out answers and support and that is a very good way to approach the situation, very healthy.

    I am amazed that your son already has been involved in a baseball game and am so excited that you and your son are moving forward this way - I have the strong feeling that you and your family will definitely work around this just fine! :)

    Keep coming back here for support, and in the future, to lend support - it helps so much. Welcome, again - we are here for you.
  14. MountainJam

    MountainJam Approved members

    Jan 25, 2010
    Yes, we have all been there. I am sorry you had to join us, but welcome.

    One of the first things I remember hearing from people with T1 experience is how quickly you become used to a new "normal". I totally did NOT believe it at the time, but 8 months later, I am amazed at how our family has adjusted. Those first few weeks are overwhelming. I am not going to say it gets better or easier, those are the wrong words, but the newness does go away and you get a routine to keep your son healthy. That is the thing you MUST keep in mind: you do the things required to keep your son healthy and allow him to live his life as normally as possible.

    If I have learned anything in since my son's dx, it is that our kids can lead a relatively normal, healthy life. They just need a little more assistance from us. My son plays baseball and basketball, is good in school, has some excellent friends and is an all around bright and active boy. The only difference from 8 months ago is that he requires his insulin from an external source. Important, yes, but just a small part of who he is.

    You sound very much like I did in Sept. 2009: overwhelmed, confused, concerned and very scared. You will get through it. We all have.
  15. PixieStix

    PixieStix Approved members

    Sep 22, 2007
    Hi BlakesDad, so sorry to hear about your son but glad you found this site. Can honestly say for me this site has been the best resource of information, up front there is so much to learn and I remember being so scared every minute of every day at first. You will be surprised how much you will learn and how well your son adapts to this new routine, especially if everyone who loves him can all work together with the goal to keep him safe, healthy, and happy. There is always someone on here who has had a similar experience--what's great is you can see how others handle things, then modify their advice to work best for Blake. You are definitely not alone, we have all walked in your shoes and know the heartbreak and fear you are feeling right now.
  16. Hockeygirl

    Hockeygirl Approved members

    Oct 6, 2007

    Sorry to hear about your son! So glad you found CWD! It is a great place for alot of support! Seems to be someone on here no matter what time it is!

    First few months are very overwhelming, but sounds like you have some people on board to help!:cwds:

    Will be praying for your family to take some of that weight off your shoulders very soon!!!!
  17. wdhinn89

    wdhinn89 Approved members

    Mar 31, 2007
    WOW!! Just reading your intro brought back so many memories. We had similiar stories and feelings. My son was 10 year old as well. You need to cry. In the shower, in the car, in your pillow, just get it out.

    It will get better. Your life will have a new norm but it does get easier with time.

    I am sorry you have to be here but glad you found us. :cwds:
  18. MichS

    MichS Approved members

    Dec 9, 2008
    Welcome to the club no one wants to join Blakesdad. I'm so sorry you are here, but happy you found CWD. The great people hear can help you with your everyday living questions, and they can be a shoulder to cry on. And, they can be the people that understand what's going on when nobody else gets it. Your story sounds very much like mine. The diagnosis itself wasn't a surprise, and I didn't cry until day 2 in the hospital, in front of the CDE and doctor.
    Good luck! Take care of you and Blake!
  19. tresmom

    tresmom Approved members

    Jul 10, 2008
    I have found it gets easier, it gets harder, it gets easier, it gets harder, and it just sucks! I didn't want to be a diabetes advocate, but this disease has started to consume so much of my life that I hope one day all this effort winds up to a cure.
  20. grantsmom

    grantsmom Approved members

    Jul 29, 2008
    I too am glad you found this site quickly.

    Reading your post brought back all the memories of our son's DX and I had a lot of the same feelings.

    We are two years into D and we are into our new "normal" as everyone told me when I first found this site. At the time, I just could not imagine it but it has happened slowly over time.

    Please post here anytime you need advise or just to vent. This board has been a life saver for us.

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