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High Numbers, Still...Did not need the "helpful" comments from a stranger.

Discussion in 'Parents of Children with Type 1' started by lauraqofu, Aug 28, 2010.

  1. lauraqofu

    lauraqofu Approved members

    Apr 19, 2010
    Ugh...So, Cass's numbers are still very high, even with the increase in both Humalog and Lantus. We were at her cousin's birthday party today and when I had her test the first time, she was at 370!! So, I gave a correction and while I was pulling out a water bottle for her, she took a sip of her diet soda. A mom of one of the guests, someone I didn't even know, said "You know, soda is, like, the worst thing for diabetics."

    I got mad, but said, "Actually, it's carb free soda, and she's type 1, not type 2." And then went about getting her water and stepped away.

    I know I only got as mad as I did because I'm stressed about her numbers, and I'm totally sleep deprived, but Cass was mad, too. Especially because as we were serving cake, I had Cass test again, and gave her a shot to cover the cake, we both observed the same woman whispering to the mom next to her and indicating Cass.

    I know I should grow a thicker skin...but why do people insist on judging how we raise our kids? And I'm supposed to what...take my daughter to a birthday party and say, no you just get to watch all the other kids eat cake? Or not let her go to her cousin's birthday?
  2. kiwiliz

    kiwiliz Approved members

    Sep 25, 2008
    It is because they are ignorant! ;) My hide is a little thicker than it used to be - and my child has cake at birthday parties!:D
  3. StillMamamia

    StillMamamia Approved members

    Nov 21, 2007
  4. 2type1s

    2type1s Approved members

    Nov 23, 2008
    So sorry you had to deal with that. Honestly, it depends on the day how I handle it. On a really strong day, I might have walked up to the whispering mom, and said "excuse me, I saw you whispering and gesturing to my daugther. I know from your earlier comment you don't understand the difference between T1 and T2"...and go on to explain in detail the disease.

    On another day I might ignore, or I might just make a rude gesture or face : )
  5. Flutterby

    Flutterby Approved members

    Nov 11, 2006
    We went to a cook out tonight.. I was talking to one of the moms... who I just met.. she knows people that have t1, but really didn't know much about it.. we were talking about Kaylee's diagnosis.. she asked if it was to much sugar.. I said, no sugar actually has nothing to do with it.. She was nice to talk to.. but I couldn't believe that people STILL think t1 is caused by sugar.. Rude people I get snippy with.. This mom, I didn't, she was very nice to talk to and was willing to learn.. I did have someone a few days ago tell me how horrible rice is for a diabetic, I really wanted to strangle her since a LOT of was kaylee eats is made of rice. This woman, however, was arrogant and wouldn't let you get a word in.. she'd just talk over you.. those people, I just walk away from.. there is no point.. they'll believe what they want.
  6. wildemoose

    wildemoose Approved members

    Nov 29, 2008
    I had a similar incident recently which was just as frustrating but gave me a little insight into how people think. I was drinking a diet root beer with my lunch, and a friend gave me a horrified look and said, "I thought you were diabetic! How can you drink soda?" I said, "But this is diet soda. It doesn't have any sugar," and she said, "Oh, that's what diet means?" It would never have occurred to me that people wouldn't know the difference between diet and regular soda, but I guess some people have just never had to think about it. Of course, the difference is that my friend accepted my explanation while this woman took it upon herself to point and whisper...ugh.
  7. deafmack

    deafmack Approved members

    Sep 22, 2006
    I think it is a good picture of how people can have the wrong conception of what we should eat or drink regardless of the type of diabetes. A lot of people with type 2 do drink diet soda or diet pop. That is their choice.
    By the way, I was at the Washington State Association for the Deaf picnic today and met a young lady who is pumping with a purple Minimed and another person who is on MDI. We had a good opportunity to talk and I really enjoyed it. They are both Deaf like me. It was a cool experience.
  8. zakksmom

    zakksmom Approved members

    Dec 27, 2009
    What a great article and advice!! I am printing out multiple copies to keep handy to educate what seems to be everybody that we come in contact with.. I actually think I will add this to my signature line on my email address to!!!
  9. caspi

    caspi Approved members

    Oct 11, 2006
    I'm sorry you and your daughter had to experience this. I am forever amazed at how rude people can be with their comments. Ugh..... :(

    Paula, that is a GREAT info sheet - thanks for sharing it! :)
  10. Blue

    Blue Approved members

    Aug 19, 2010
    I'm so sorry you and your daughter had to deal with that situation. At least you understand that she can have cake with the proper insulin coverage. I just found out that my stepson wasn't allowed to eat any of the cake served at his second birthday party because he has diabetes.

    The amount of misinformation out there is scary . . . which is why I'm a lurker on this site.
  11. sisterbeth43

    sisterbeth43 Approved members

    Oct 14, 2007
    Some people are just ignorant. I had lots of people make stupid comments to me too. One coworker kept saying to me that Reann "has it really bad" because she was on insulin. One woman told me she would die within two years so to make the most of the time I had left with her. I just ignored them all. If you have the time and incentive, you can try to educate them. Even my sister whose son was dx'd type 1 as an adult still thinks he and Reann have the same diabetes as I have and my dad and brothers had.NOT
  12. Gdad

    Gdad Approved members

    Jul 22, 2009
    We had a similar experience where a mom warned her kid they would 'get diabetes too' if they ate any more cake. My wife talked to her about it but I doubt it did much good.

    Thanks for the Myths and Misconceptions link- I posted that on my facebook.
  13. denise3099

    denise3099 Approved members

    Jul 31, 2009
    You're a better person than I am! That deserved a punch in the mouth!!! :mad: On what planet is such a comment acceptable under any circumstances!?!?! What is wrong with ppl???? :(
  14. spamid

    spamid Approved members

    Jul 11, 2006
    What I find hysterical is that these ignorant people often think nothing of their own darling stuffing their face with birthday cake, cokes, and the like while they point fingers.
  15. Connie(BC)Type 1

    Connie(BC)Type 1 Approved members

    Nov 11, 2005

    Why do you need a thicker skin, they need to learn to mind their own business, or learn about Type 1
  16. sam1nat2

    sam1nat2 Approved members

    Jan 24, 2007
    I'm sorry you had to deal with that!!!

    Its not just D, people can be so judgemental about whatever you feed your child.

    When my youngest was breastfeeding, I got comments on why people couldn't or wouldn't breastfeed---no, I never asked what they fed their infants.
    Now that Sophie is dairy free, I get comments about why soy is bad, why she should have this over that. I've learned how to perfect the eye roll:rolleyes:
  17. denise3099

    denise3099 Approved members

    Jul 31, 2009
    OMG, ain't that the truth. And not just what you feed your kids, but all sorts of things that are nobody's business. In fact, I wonder how many stupid comments I've made to ppl when i shuold have been minding my own beeswax. sigh.

    My son has Aspergers, ADHD, etc. There have been times and places when I've had to let him have his tantrum while continuing whatever excercise I have planned for him. Among judgemental stares. Now when I see some poor tired mom with a screaming child, a just give her my sympathetic half smile and let her do her job.

    And then there are the times when your child is low and screaming in cranky discomfort and you give him a fistfull of skittles, under the disapproving gaze of the masses. I sometimes look around and catch someone's eye--with a wry smile, I say, "They medicinal." ;)
  18. MHoskins2179

    MHoskins2179 Approved members

    Mar 14, 2010
    Sorry you got that comment. It really all depends on the day for me, as far as my reaction to these types of comments. Try to maintain a sense of humor and educate/advocate as much as possible, but it's not always easy.

    Like, I got all bent out of shape just the other night when watching with my wife a re-run of a Criminal Minds episode, where one of the regulars says a "severely diabetic" man wouldn't have reached into a candy dish at a crime scene. That threw me into a rant...

    Until Suzi suggested I calm down and go find a bowl of candy to stick my hand into.

    Thick skin works sometimes, but sometimes it just doesn't do any good.

    Good luck down the road!
  19. KHM

    KHM Approved members

    Mar 24, 2010
    You did better than I could have. Just reading it I began thinking that I'd have had to say, "so---you know a lot about diabetes, do you? Because what you just said isn't the slightest bit true. I'm thinking you might want to ask more and advise less."

    Of course, today someone asked me if I'd been able to "stabilize" Lindsay's diabetes. Sure; and the earth rotates on my index finger, too. Or is it that one right next to it...?
  20. slpmom2

    slpmom2 Approved members

    May 16, 2008
    Yeah, we often get the "is her blood sugar stable?" question, including from medical personnel. Last week, at the eye doctor, the assistant asked if dd's blood sugar was stable today. It was morning, and I told her that we'd only checked once so far today, when she'd woken up, and it was a little high, but that, in general, she's doing just fine. She paused as she tried to figure out what to make of that, and then just wrote in the chart "BS stable today." Whatever.

    I'm still steaming about an interaction I had about an hour ago. My dd was having a first playdate with a friend from school, and I wanted her to check her BG. She checked, was high, and handed me her pump to put in the number and dose the correction. Typically she'll do it herself, but with her friend over and all the distraction (and she's VERY distractible), she wanted me to do it - no problem. The friend's mom, who was sitting with us, said, "You have to learn to do it yourself! There's another boy with diabetes at school and he does it all himself." I immediately jumped in with, "She does an awful lot by herself", but refrained from getting on my soap box about how much of a burden this disease is around the clock, and I wouldn't expect any 9-year-old to "do it all herself". And I know the other boy at her school, and know that, independent as he is, his parents are plenty involved. She just has no idea (she also told her daughter on the way over here that she couldn't eat in front of my dd because my dd has diabetes and it would be rude). I just hated that she was telling my kid what she has to learn to do for herself. It's none of her danged business. :mad:

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