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He's fine, I am not!

Discussion in 'Parents of Children with Type 1' started by manda81, Mar 24, 2011.

  1. manda81

    manda81 Approved members

    Feb 17, 2010
    How did you guys get through those first days of school? I'm already having serious anxiety over sending my son to start school this fall. He was dx when he was 2, so this is not only his first time at school, but with D as well.

    I am just truly scared and I just don't know how I'm going to handle it when he goes to school and I have to put that trust in the people there.

    How did you do it? Did you do anything particular those first few days/weeks? Should I just buy myself a hard drink or 5 and pair it with a chill pill?

    Generally I don't freak over D. We just take it and move on, and always have, but with him being there, instead of here with me where I can manage this, uggg.... I'm just freaked out!
  2. frizzyrazzy

    frizzyrazzy Approved members

    Dec 23, 2006
    gosh, for me it was so different. Ian was dx 2 weeks into K, so when he came out of the hospital I was still in that naive place where I had no idea I should even be nervous. LOL. I can't imagine the feeling of relinquishing control. Even still, I did sit for a very long time in the parking lot the first few days LOL. And I never was far away from my phone.

    Could you meet with his teacher this spring and at least give her/him information on diabetes and also meet with the nurse - not so much to lay down an official 504 and health plan but to work out how your philosophy and care will mesh with hers. Then, just before school starts meet with both again (in our case it's usually the day before school starts) and go over the nitty gritty of what you want done, and how.

    Good luck.
  3. joan

    joan Approved members

    Aug 31, 2009
    my son was diagnosed as a toddler and when he started real school ( every day) things just started to get easier. I fed him the same type of bfk, gave him the same lunch and the scheduled days were so much easier. I went on every field trip, I can't tell you how many times I went apple picking. We had a wonderful nurse . The first week or so I was in the office making sure he was ok but school really made everything easier. He is now a senior in HS getting ready to graduate, I really can't believe it. It seems like yesterday I was in your shoes.
  4. AlisonKS

    AlisonKS Approved members

    May 16, 2007
    this is Tony's first year of kindergarten, thankfully half day to ease into it. in may or june call the school and give them a heads up, they can give you a time frame to meet before school starts with the nurse, teacher, and other staff. there are tons of meetings, I really can't keep track of how many we had lol. the 504 was officially signed soon after school started, then he got dx with other stuff so we went through the same process with an IEP.
    he did start preschool around this time of year-it was right down the street and they were willing to help. I think that calmed me down because it was the first time someone that was a non-family member had to take care of him and it was only for a few hours a day twice a week.
    check out the ADA, they have safe at school classes for you to take, they let you know all of your rights and show you how to get what you want plus a fat binder of information and references. I also met a few moms who were old pros at this but just came along for a refresher and to support the newbies. Ours had nurses that can go out and train the school.
  5. manda81

    manda81 Approved members

    Feb 17, 2010
    I have talked to the nurse, albeit briefly, at the start of the current school year. We met to discuss my oldest son having Celiac, and there was a kiddo then who came in talking about how he was getting a new pump, so I know my son won't be the only one there with D.

    We will have a kindergarten roundup in May, and I will definitely be there and speak with her again.

    I have to give them credit for handling Alex's CD soooo well. We have had no issues at all, and his teacher calls me with any/all questions, the cafeteria has gone through training, and I have the dietitian (who is also a CDE)'s number & email, and we've talked several times as well. If their handling of CD is any indication of how they will deal with his D, then I know he is in good hands.

    I just don't know how I am going to get through trusting them with his care. Not because they're unprepared, but because they're not "mom". Does that make sense?

    I think he will be safe, rationally I know he's not the first D-kid to start school, and we are in a fantastic school district.... I just don't know how I'm going to let them handle this.

    He is not scared, he's totally excited to go (we kept him at home last year, so he's going to be a year late starting), this is all me. UGGG!
  6. Sarah Maddie's Mom

    Sarah Maddie's Mom Approved members

    Sep 23, 2007
    You're already ahead of the game ;)

    By starting now and gathering up contact names and making introductions you're off to a great start.

    I've always found Sept to be a really stressful month. Dh, a prof., is crazy busy at work and getting all the stock of supplies and all the documents and holding meetings with teachers takes time and energy and $$ and planning and just when I think my head will explode, it's Sept 23rd and we're settled into the routine and I know what the school day is like and I have everyone's phone number in my cell and then... it's grand.:cwds:

    When you can let other people in and let them help and when your child sees that he is safe in the care of others, well, it's all good.:cool:
  7. tiger7lady

    tiger7lady Approved members

    Sep 14, 2010
    Vincent wasn't diagnosed as a toddler, he was 9 at the time but I found it hard to let go as well. We didn't have a hospital stay, just a crash course at the endo the day after he was diagnosed. Then he returned to school the following day. I went in and tried my best to explain it all to the nurse with the feeling that I didn't even know what I was talking about yet. It will work out. Just keep the communication lines open and eventually the anxiety will melt away. Maybe not completely but you will eventually feel better about someone else watching his D.
  8. swimmom

    swimmom Approved members

    Feb 23, 2007
    It's great that you already have a good relationship with the school. I don't work outside the home, so here's what I did. Lauren is my youngest, so I was already familiar with school personnel when she was diagnosed in 2nd grade. I was also very reluctant to leave her (considered homeschooling, etc.). I became the librarian's best friend. The library was an excellent place to hover. There was a backlog of projects and she needed help checking out books when classes visited. It was perfect. I was at school quite a lot (especially around lunch time, PE and recess), but not in my daughter's way. I also took over the school's literacy library (basically a closet with sets of paperback books). Also a great place to be available, but out of the way. The nurse knew where to find me (or I would wander into the clinic before lunch to help with BG checks and give the shot - which Lauren preferred).

    I also helped the nurse (whom I really like a lot) with anything she needed (making copies, crowd control for sight & hearing screenings, whatever). I helped the office staff (answered phones, made copies, filed).

    There are tons of volunteer opportunities in schools. I'm sure next year will be worse given all the budget cuts.

    Lauren just thought I was just volunteering and didn't realize I was hovering because I was scared to leave her. I eased up bit by bit as we both figured out how to manage D (and I saw for myself that I could trust the care at school).

    Looking back, I was a little nutty at first and it definitely helped my sanity to be on campus for part of the day most days. As a side benefit, I made some wonderful friends and still keep up with our elementary school nurse and librarian and the office staff.
  9. momof2here

    momof2here Approved members

    Apr 7, 2009
    My son was diagnosed in March of 5th grade. I was accustomed to dealing with school based upon providing substantially enriching activities for my son and volunteering for classroom activities and parties - this was a whole different matter. I became very versed in advocating for my son and educating - teachers, the nurse, the principal - you name it.

    The most important thing to do is to inform the people who will be responsible for your child about your child's needs. Provide the personnel with all materials needed to keep your child safe and follow through to make sure everyone is on the same page. Meet with the teachers and principal and provide info about hypo/hyperglycemia and model how to use glucagon.

    A 504 plan is always the best way to make sure that everyone is on the same page. We do not have one now since we are in a school that has done almost everything they can to ensure a safe and fair academic environment for our son.
  10. aidensmom

    aidensmom Approved members

    May 15, 2008
    My son was also dx'd at 2 and will be starting K this fall. However, he's been in daycare for 1 1/2 years, so it won't be his first time away from me. I'm actually a bit relieved that there will be a real nurse on staff at the elementary school. At daycare his teachers handle everything (and they have been great). One way I like to look at it is . . . each day that he spends with me or my husband is not perfect and it won't be when he's away from us either. We just have to do our best, give great instruction and continue working together for the best possible situation. It sounds like you already have a great nurse that is somewhat familier with D, so that's reassuring.

    I think sending our babies off to K is going to be a little scary and stressful with or without D. Just keep that phone close and try to stay busy that day :cwds: Good Luck!
  11. StillMamamia

    StillMamamia Approved members

    Nov 21, 2007
    I should've done this!:eek:

    Anyway, I was a nervous wreck for the first few weeks, to the point of puking. TMI?:eek: But you will get through that. Be sure everyone feels comfortable enough to take on the challenge and then you'll start to feel better.

    Then you'll have the field trips.:eek: Oh boy, yeah, those kinda make you nervous too, but you'll get through them as well.

    Leave plenty of strips, batteries, tabs, slower carbs with a detailed sheet/sheets on what to do and have your cellphone with you at all times. Leave Glucagon as well. Pack stuff in labeled boxes and leave them with however many teachers your kid will have. There will probably be stuff you'll forget, but you can always add those on as they come.

    Good luck!
  12. DsMom

    DsMom Approved members

    Nov 9, 2010
    Daniel was diagnosed a week or so after he began 3xs/week pre-K. After keeping him home a week or so, he went back, and it was a good introduction to school for him and me. It was only a couple of hours 3 times a week, no food or insulin required. I was nervous, but thank God for cell phones--I knew they could always reach me.

    Kindergarten was only 1/2 day too (is your child's?)--so it wasn't too much different. We did a 504 plan at the end of summer so that teacher, nurses, staff were on board. Again, because he wasn't eating there, it wasn't too bad.

    The beginning of first grade was VERY hard for me because he is there all day and had to eat away from me (or his grandparents) for the first time. I must say I sat staring at the clock the first few weeks waiting for them to call me at lunch time. We had a rocky start the first few days, but things are very smooth now. The nurses know what they are doing, and call if they have questions.

    It is VERY hard to let go. Probably the most nervous I've been was sending him to a 1/2 day summer camp 2 years ago. LOTS of activity, NO nurse or anyone experienced with D. But, they called if they needed me, and--again--it all worked out. Just accept that you will be nervous at first, but with lots of preparation and a good plan in place, you and your child will be fine.

    I'm sure you have a cell phone, so you can always be reached. Just specify very clearly in what cases you want to be called to be informed of your child's BG. Daniel is checked before recess, then again afterwards (which is before lunch), and before gym or any other unscheduled physical activity (and afterward if I request it according to his BG). He also goes to the nurse WAY too much on his own (he really likes them!) to get checked if he is thirsty, tired, or has a tummy ache. Because of all this testing, his A1c has actually improved quite a bit:D, but I don't like the time it takes from classwork.:rolleyes:

    Good luck, prepare, and try not to worry too much! It will be fine.:cwds:

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