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Her first low tonight. Scary. All over now.

Discussion in 'Parents of Children with Type 1' started by greenpalm, Mar 23, 2013.

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  1. Mish

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    I really don't think it's any of our business how her husband deals with his own diabetes, nor is what he does for his type 1.5 really relevant to the discussion at hand.

    The child is 6. Under the care of the mother. I'm sure if the OP's husband wanted advice he'd ask for it.

    FFS, the OP's child was just diagnosed less than 2 weeks ago. I'm sure if she needs advice on a spouse and diabetes she may someone with experience (cause none of you all have experience with a spouse with diabetes) OR perhaps they'll get to that topic sometime when the whole rush of diagnosis clears.
     
  2. 3kidlets

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    My father in law is T1 for 37 years. When he is with my mother in law, she always has the sugar. Not him. But he has travelled the world for work without her and managed just fine on his own. I agree, maybe it is the break he needs and can rely on her.
     
  3. caspi

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    But the OP brought the husband's diabetes and his actions into the conversation which is why some of us commented on it. ;)
     
  4. Christopher

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    In my opinion, a parents behavior and attitude about diabetes is absolutely relevant and critical to a child with diabetes. Even more so if that parent actually has diabetes themselves. The OP's daughter's management of her diabetes will be influenced by how she sees her Father manage his.

    I am not sure how you would know who the child is "under the care" of. But regardless, even if the OP does all of the child's care, the child will still see the way her Father handles his diabetes on a daily basis and be influenced by it.
     
    Last edited: Mar 24, 2013
  5. mmgirls

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    I never said I wanted to know how the father/spouse deals with his D nor was I trying to give advice on dealing with a spouse in D world.

    All I was trying to do was point out that they should have a sit down discussion about it within their family, it should just be part of their learning process being so close to a new Dx.

    I truly hope that the differencec in care do not become an issue, that simply it is just an adjustment period for the family and they will get along swimminingly well soon.
     
  6. sooz

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    I think you will find as you have more experience with your daughter's D that she will need a different amount of carbs depending on how low the low was. It is always best to err on the side of caution though, especially in the beginning. For example, perhaps eight grams of carbs would be enough to bring her to a comfortable number, but 15 might throw her too high. Time will tell how her body reacts to carbs. I learned an unforgettable lesson when my granddaughter hadn't been diagnosed too long. She was at her little gym class and told me she felt low. I told her, no honey, we tested right before class and you were fine. She said no grammie I feel low. So I tested her and she was ultra low! I felt horrible for doubting her. I ALWAYS test now if she says she is low. They can drop so fast sometimes it is unbelievable. we use juice boxes when she is very low, but we also use four gram glucose tabs and Starburst candy which are also four g. to customize how much carbs we want to gve her. Other people use Skittles which I believe are 1 g. each.
     
  7. Becky Stevens mom

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    Just wanted to say hello and welcome Julie :) Im sorry about your daughters recent diagnosis. I know this is hard for all of you right now. Youll learn a bit more as you go along. Type 1 in young children is very different from type 1 in adults. When they go low, the drop can be sudden and they can go from feeling poorly to nearly passing out in a matter of seconds.

    I will often start treating a low before testing because I know now what Steven looks like when hes really low. He gets that definite "I am really out of it" look about him and I just want to start getting the carbs in as quickly as possible. Id rather him be a little high if he was mistaken (this has rarely happened over the almost 9 years we've been dealing with d) then to continue dropping while I test him. I do test right after giving him carbs though to see if I need to give him more.
     
  8. mmgirls

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    I am at a loss? I simply have no idea where you are coming from with your posts to me?

    What makes me qualified? since this particular forum of the many on CWD, is "Parents of children with Type 1", I would say that since my dd was Dx'd over 7years ago at 13 months that is all the qualification that is needed.

    Why don't we take a step back here and let the OP guide this thread instead of us guessing what is helpfull or unhelpfull. What is assumption or what is perception based on individual experience or many other things.

    To the OP, I am sorry there has been so much back and forth from me and another poster, I had no idea that that would occur. I hope that I have been helpful in at least the smallest way.
     
  9. greenpalm

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    I have respectfully snipped your posts for brevity and focus:


    I appreciate that all of you were trying to help. I posted because I wanted help and guidance. I do think we got derailed here just a bit about with what, exactly, I wanted guidance. I have no intention of telling DH what kind of role model I think he should or shouldn't be. I've already said that I have found him to be a wonderful role model. I don't have a single problem with the example he is setting for her. Most of her care will fall to me. I'm at home all day. I stayed in the hospital with her. He travels for business.

    That said, he's certainly going to be the only on-going example she sees for care, but, I haven't seen him acting as a poor one, and even if I saw less than perfect behavior, human behavior, if you will, it would have to be a horrifically negligent behavior before I would even consider sitting him down to a discussion wherein I would take it upon myself to correct or guide the example he's setting for her. As if I somehow know better.

    As an analogy, I can just imagine, in 7 years, she's 13, and she starts her periods. He sits me down and says, "You know, Honey, you're the only role model she has for managing her feminine hygiene care. I think we should all sit down together and discuss how you've managed your care all these years, so I can be sure you're setting a good example. Remember now, there've been several times that you've asked me to run to the store late at night because you don't have all your supplies in stock. It's true, you've never had an embarrassing leak in public, Dear, but your carelessness means it could happen any time. I'm really worried that by not checking for supplies often enough you're setting up our daughter for failure. She's counting on you to do a good job with your periods, so she can learn to do a good job with hers. I'm going to make it my business to keep an eye on you, because now that she's having periods of her own, I don't know if I'm comfortable with your cavalier attitude."

    I'd probably deck him. :p

    Yes! This! I brought up the hubster because I was comparing how I react and respond to his lows. I was processing out loud that it may be quite different for her. I was pointing out the contrast between my blase attitude towards his lows and hers, because after 14 years, I can see them coming, know what they look like, know how to fix them, and can even somewhat predict them. I know what kind of activities and changes in schedule are likely to bring them on. I know to keep snacks with me. (Actually I keep snacks for myself, and for three hungry kids, he just counts on me to have them, and I don't mind sharing) I'm used to his. I know what to expect. On the other hand, since she's newly dx, I'm not able to do that yet. That's why I brought him up, because I'm realizing that it's the same, but different. It's interesting to me to observe this difference, and others.

    I do thank so many of you for your kind words of encouragement. I'm sure I'll get to know her responses better. The first low was scary, but I was cheering afterward that she came to get me! Very pleased that she recognized the signals her body was giving off. Thanks!
     
    Last edited: Mar 25, 2013
  10. dzirbel

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    Welcome! I just wanted to also say I think you reacted appropriately. I also want to say that you seem to be a wonderful caretaker to your daughter as well as your husband. I think it is awesome that you are there to give him a bit of break with D. That is what good marriages are about.

    I agree that your daughter's care will be different then hubby because of all the growth spurts, hormones, activity etc. Trust your instincts and trust your daughter and you will do great. Lows are scary sometimes and then sometimes I think to myself...maybe that low should have concerned me more! I look at this as a cycle...sometimes I'm reading, researching and really examining all the data and then sometimes we just do the day to day, correct, treat and don't even think of all the other stuff and trends in BG etc. It's like a sort of mental break from it all. Not sure if that makes sense!
     
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