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Friends who actually want to learn...

Discussion in 'Parents of Children with Type 1' started by Brandi's mom, Dec 23, 2010.

  1. Brandi's mom

    Brandi's mom Approved members

    Dec 18, 2009
    I read posts on here about how people's friends/family just don't get it or are too stubbon to pay attention.

    Anyone want to share positive experiences with your friends/family?

    Almost all of my good friends have been very inquisitive and have tried to learn and understand what Brandi is going thru. They ask questions and listen when I answer.

    The only people I have had trouble with are people who are Type 2 and just assume that since they get sugar free desserts for themselves she should have them too.
  2. KatieJane'smom

    KatieJane'smom Approved members

    Jun 15, 2008
    When my dd was first diagnosed her grandmother was there the entire time and came to the education classes with us so she could learn everything she could about Type 1 and how to manage it.

    When we came home from the hospital, my friend came over with a big notebook to organize all the papers and info. we had gotten in the hospital and to help organize all the D supplies. She always remembers to have some special food/dessert (dd also has food allergies) when we go to her house.

    Really, the only people we had trouble with was the school and that is still a nightmare after all this time.
  3. McKenna'smom

    McKenna'smom Approved members

    Jan 5, 2010
    My daughter's friend's older sister wants to babysit. She and her mom signed up through our local ADA to take a class to learn about diabetes so she could babysit Type 1 kids, including my daughter.

    Otherwise, we have a couple of her friend's mom's who were willing to learn what they could so DD could spend the night at their house, etc.
  4. Daniel's Mom 1993

    Daniel's Mom 1993 Approved members

    Dec 31, 2007
    My mother in law and sister in law both came to training classes when Daniel was dx, but since he was 14 at dx he really has not needed their help but at least they took the step and know what he has to go through.
    His best friend also went to 2 training classes with us which for a 14 yr boy to volunteer to go was amazing to me..he is still Daniel's best friend!:)
  5. twintype1s

    twintype1s Approved members

    Jun 4, 2010
    My boys have 3 good friends who all go out of their way to make gluten free treats for birthdays & school parties, and the moms all call me ahead of time so we can figure out carb counts. It makes a huge difference to Jack and Nate.
  6. Mom264

    Mom264 Approved members

    Mar 17, 2009
    Every one of dd's close friends (and their families) goes out of their way to learn eveything from carbs to Glucagon. It is great.:D

    Unbelievably it is my family and dh's family that really doesn't pay much attention, thinks that I a being over-concerned and just doesn't get it. The attitude is "Leslie will take care of it." Ironic.:(
  7. MamaBear

    MamaBear Approved members

    Jul 20, 2010
    We have one example of someone willing to learn. One of my son's best friends, the only best friend he has left now actually. This kid is only 10 but his understanding,support, and maturity amaze me. His mother has an auto immune disease in which her body produces excess insulin, can't recall what it is called so forgive me, but she has to watch what she eats and has a book similar to calorie king. So her son carries around her little book while looking through their pantry and fridge, trying to calculate how much insulin my son would need if he were to come over for lunch or dinner. His mother has welcomed me when I said that I need to be there if my son comes for a visit. They both ask questions, and never make rude or ignorant comments. And both act like it's no biggie when he tests his blood. She said to her son the first time my son tested in front of him "hey that's just like the meter I used to have. Remember?" He nodded and that was the end of it. We were just there a few days ago for a visit, to let the boys hang out, and she said that if I am comfortable with it, she would like to take him with their family to see Tron,and she will be happy to help him test and inject for any snacks. But if I am not comfortable with letting him go just yet, I am welcome to come as well. I thanked her for being so supportive since diagnosis, since his other best friend has had nothing to do with him since. She just gave me a funny look and said "why wouldn't we be?" Good supportive friends.:)
  8. liasmommy2000

    liasmommy2000 Approved members

    Oct 31, 2006
    I've been pretty lucky for the most part. My parents and sister get it pretty darn well and help with Lia all the time. Honestly it never ever occurred to me that they wouldn't. Long example ahead.

    My parents first watched Lia for the day about a month after diagnosis. It was a no school day (president's day?) and I had to work. We dropped her off in the morning and they were also watching my nephew. They had some errands to run including teeth cleaning appointments. Lia had been a little whiny all morning and saying she wanted mommy. It was a little odd as until she started kindergarten a few months prior to that my mom had watched her every day while I worked and she adores my parents and had never had any issues like this. I thought maybe she was just nervous that they wouldn't know how to deal with D so I reassured her.

    Turns out she was coming down with a bug and ended up throwing up all over the floor in the dentists office in the middle of my mom getting her teeth cleaned. So I'm at work an hour away. My parents called me as they are trying to clean her up in their van in the parking lot of the dentists office and I'm trying to tell them over the phone that they need to check her blood and ketones. My cell phone battery was dying so I'm speeding down the freeway trying to find my car charger and I can hear Lia telling them that they are doing something wrong with the meter.

    All was well and they still never hesitated to watch her again. They had never changed a site or refilled a pump and one time I forgot to change it and she was spending the night and it was beeping low cartridge. I had to talk them through that over the phone. Again, we managed. Fun times lol.

    My sister is watching her today as I don't start my vacation until tomorrow but yesterday was the last day of school. My sister once went to recap a syringe and poked herself under the fingernail. No big deal to her.

    Most others have been fairly understanding. I've had ignorant comments but not nearly as much as others it seems. Most people seem to really care and want to understand. Some care but don't seem to get it, but keep it to themselves mostly so I don't get too worked up.

    We've been pretty darn lucky overall. Lia is very lucky to have wonderful grandparents and aunt!
  9. Lucky 868

    Lucky 868 Approved members

    Apr 13, 2010
    Our nieghbors have been a godsend.

    Their daughter died of cancer at the age of 14 in 2008 and they treat our feelings and adjustment to dealing with D as if it is similar to their experience (which it isn't - they went through hell on Earth). When I called to ask if they could take care of the cats while we were at the hospital, they were at my house before I hung up the phone. Told me to write down every little thing that happened, what we were told at the hospital because we'd forget so much when we got home due to being overwhelmed and a lack of sleep. They were right! They cooked us dinner the night we came home and had carb counts figured out for every ingredient in every item. They made my son's favorite dinner, so gave me the carb list for future reference. A week later, they had my son to dinner at their house, without us, so he could start learning about eating away from home on his own. When my son goes to their house, he has a spot for his emergency kit. They've been trained on D care, although they are experts on giving shots and told me how to use the glucagon kit.

    They were the most emotionally supportive when we got home. The mom talked to me about pacing myself with learning about D, dealing with the 2:00 a.m. checks and exhaustion. She sympathized with how hard it was to grasp how different my son's life is now. Absolutely amazing people! To relate to our diagnosis and experience, which is nothing compared to what their daughter went through, just says how wonderful they are. We are blessed to have friends like them.

    Mom to N, 17
  10. deafmack

    deafmack Approved members

    Sep 22, 2006
    If those friends with type 2 are eating sugar free desserts I bet they are spending a lot of time in the bathroom. I know I would be.
  11. deafmack

    deafmack Approved members

    Sep 22, 2006
    I love it when friends get it and want to learn. Today, I met a friend for lunch and she had read about the strip recall from Abbot. It was so cute. She thought the meters were bad as well. Well I use an Aviva but she not knowing I didn't use a meter and strips from Abbot offered to replace my meter and all of my strips for the next month for free. Just the thought that she would do that was so precious. I felt so grateful for her generosity although I declined her offer.
  12. swimmom

    swimmom Approved members

    Feb 23, 2007
    We are really lucky and blessed with friends who always helped out. When Lauren was younger, they'd give me the menu ahead of time and make sure they had juice on hand, etc. Now that's she's pretty independent, they still make sure she texts me, has what she needs, etc. She has 4 good friends whose parents are trained and want to have her over for sleep-overs.

    We recently went on a Girl Scout overnight trip. I was challenged by a schedule conflict and was so worried that I wouldn't be able to go (and neither would Lauren). Her troop leader (also a good friend) just said there was no way they were leaving Lauren home. She and another mom (an RN) were greared up and ready to do whatever was needed to make sure Lauren went and had fun. Still makes me tear up to think about it.
  13. shekov

    shekov Approved members

    Feb 22, 2008
    My best experience came this year when dd strted kindergarten. Her teacher did research, did online pump training, and took notes during the training I gave the teachers and staff before school began. She has done 100% of D care in the classroom and is AWESOME!

    Prior to this our best experience was my MIL offering to babysit as ong as dd didn't need to eat while she was there.
  14. Charlotte'sMom

    Charlotte'sMom Approved members

    Dec 6, 2008
    My mom, 2 sisters and 4 sister-in-laws all sat through a "diabetes 101" class from me so they could watch Charlotte. I had posters and everything. :rolleyes: That was 1 1/2 years ago. Several of my sisters do a weekly babysitting co-op, so they watch Charlotte a lot. They are really good at making those decisions only a seasoned d-parent does-- like cutting back on a meal bolus because they know she's going to go outside and bounce on the trampoline which might make her go low, etc. I never worry about her when she's with them.

    It took a little more time for me to get comfortable with leaving C with my mom. And she still calls so I can walk her through the bolus on the pump. But I trust her too.

    I don't know what I'd do without my family, honestly.
  15. nanhsot

    nanhsot Approved members

    Feb 20, 2010
    This isn't so much about learning how to manage, but it really touched my heart. My mom's book club normally exchanges gifts at Christmas but this year they all donated the money they would have spent to the JDRF, in his name.

    The large majority of my close friends want very much to learn, my son is older so I think it's a lot easier in some ways, he does his own counts/shots and such, all I need friends he stays with to do is to let him know what he's eating and all but 1 friend are really good about that.

    In fact, just this week he ran out of strips on an unplanned sleepover and had to call us at midnight for more. I saw the mom a few days later and apologized if he kept her up, she was really so sweet and nonchalant about it all. It made me realize how lucky we are to be surrounded by people who really seem to care about him.
  16. MommaRetta

    MommaRetta Approved members

    May 28, 2008
    We have been blessed with amazing friends and family as well.

    For example:
    This year in Stephen's class, a couple of his classmates have stressed to their Moms about having the nutrition label on whatever treat is brought to the classroom. He had one playmate get concerned and told the playground teacher and offered to walk with him to the nurse's office. Stephen was low and it was one of the few times he hadn't felt it.

    The lady that takes our children to and from school is Type 1 as well. She has been an absolute God-send. She was recently widowed and our son has really taken to her son and I could go on and on...

    I like this thread. It's nice to take time and reflect on the good things that come our way admidst all the yuck stuff that generally accompanies our life.

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