This isn't exactly off topic, but not directly D, either. For those of you who have wondered where I've been for a while, well, this should cover it. As usual, I'll probably ramble... When I was 40, and pregnant with Yos, I prayed alot for a healthy child. When he was diagnosed with D, the thing that kept running through my mind was wondering if he wasn't meant for something worse, and this is what we got instead. I'm not about to say I believe there is an ultimate plan to the universe, but I'll say that, in my mind, I have to put a positive spin on everything in order to cope. Its just how I deal. And, I've had to deal alot in the past several years. This past year has been rough, but I'm about to catch the tail I've been chasing. So, (yes, every once in a while I'll begin a new paragraph whether its needed or not) my husband had a pretty bad stomach ache at the end of June. It was the same as the one he'd had about a month before that went away after a few hours. (That dern heartburn!) Long story (and it is) short, he drove himself to the hospital at 3 AM, and by 3 PM the next day they were pulling a malignant tumor out of him. Thus began the search for more cancer. I can happily report that the tumor they found in his esophagus was found because of this search. Why happily? Usually, by the time they find it, it is terminal. We dodged a bullet and found it early. We are dealing with this like we deal with everything else that comes at us. We aren't given much of a choice, so we add it to the "crappy stuff to do" list and move on. Odds are in his favor. Good thing. When I was looking at life without him, the picture didn't look so great. So, we spent last week at a cancer hospital. As I looked around at all of the young children, women (perhaps young mothers), and old men (swapping war stories) I was reminded how grateful I need to be for what I have. And, boy was I feeling it! I'll take the T1D, frustration with learning disabilities, ADHD, and all the other things (that I don't talk about), along with a cancer that has a good prognosis, as far as we know for now. After the shock of a baby diagnosed with D,well, that life experience helped me feel like I can manage whatever comes along, without too much drama. Perhaps I'm even grateful for that.