- advertisement -

Ex husbands 1st visit since Celiac dx....:(

Discussion in 'Celiac' started by chocoholicsc, Jun 4, 2012.

  1. chocoholicsc

    chocoholicsc Approved members

    Joined:
    Apr 1, 2008
    Messages:
    1,030
    I repeatedly urged him to read and get informed on Celiac, and he told me that he was reading and talking to people. I guess I had a false sense of security that all would be ok.
    He had our son for two days this weekend and tried to feed him a chips ahoy chocolate chip cookie and also an ice cream sandwich :mad:
    The girls told him that he can't have those things and their dad responded by saying that it's not a big deal, that eating it wouldn't bother him for at least 5 yrs...!:mad: Oh, and Dads girlfriend agreed with him...:rolleyes:
    Next month he is taking the kids for 19 days, this will be the longest time they've been with him since before the divorce. What should I do??

    Thanks!
     
  2. TheLegoRef

    TheLegoRef Approved members

    Joined:
    Nov 13, 2011
    Messages:
    328
    I don't know much about what your son's reaction is, but would stopping visitation be an appropriate reaction? I guess it depends on what state you live in, but if my kids were going to be fed things that they can't have, and have a serious health concern, they wouldn't be going over there. I know people who have stopped visitations for health reasons. Do you have a lawyer still that you can ask?

    Or if you don't think it's that serious, could you just send a list of ingredients that he can't have? Or give it to your son and tell him to check all the foods for those ingredients, and tell him to not eat those foods, and to find something else on his own?
     
  3. Caldercup

    Caldercup Approved members

    Joined:
    Oct 8, 2008
    Messages:
    1,008
    Your daughter did the right thing in saying that her brother couldn't eat what was being offered. Not that I'd want her being oppositional to her father, but she should be praised for advocating for her little brother.

    I would get a letter from your GI (or CDE or whoever is following your son's Celiac dx) that states a celiac reaction is an immediate, painful, messy, embarrassing thing to deal with. There is no "five year" wait on how it will affect the patient. Compliance with a GF diet is the only "cure."

    Did your son consume the gluten foods? Did he get a painful reaction? For us, the first accidental gluten incident was incredibly painful and wretched -- and we were both committed to being totally GF. Just a bit of cross-contamination and we were both awake at 3AM and racing for the bathroom. (And we'd been totally asymptomatic before dx.)

    Good luck dealing with this. I'm sure it can't be easy...
     
  4. chocoholicsc

    chocoholicsc Approved members

    Joined:
    Apr 1, 2008
    Messages:
    1,030
    Thank you for your reply. Christopher has always been asymptomatic, he has no reaction. I can't really ask him to check his foods yet, since he's only 6 and this is still really new to us. The other problem is that their father lives in NY and we are in SC, and he is allowed visitation. There was a time when one of my kids did not want to be forced to visit him and my lawyer told us that unless he is physically abusive in some way, he will be allowed to visit his kids, and I have to make them go whenever he makes time for them, 2- 3 times a year.
     
  5. chocoholicsc

    chocoholicsc Approved members

    Joined:
    Apr 1, 2008
    Messages:
    1,030

    I agree with you, I did praise both girls for watching out for their little brother. I think a letter is a great idea, I will call and ask for one. Christopher did not eat the gluten items offered to him, since the girls stepped in and said it wasn't ok, this time.
    More than the fact he thought it was ok, what disturbs me is his remark that it's not a big deal and wouldn't affect him for 5 yrs...(??) plus the fact that he then said, oh great, I'm sure your mother will hear about this...! :mad::mad: also, the very helpful girlfriend is sitting there agreeing that he should eat it...:(

    Thanks for listening to me vent!
     
  6. Helenmomofsporty13yearold

    Helenmomofsporty13yearold Approved members

    Joined:
    Oct 5, 2008
    Messages:
    702
    Ex's....can't live with 'em and you can't just shoot 'em! The letter is a great idea. Although it is a lot of responsibility, I think the older siblings need to be enlisted to "educate" Dad and his girlfriend. You can present it kindly, as "Dad will need some help getting the hang of this," rather than criticizing him as he is their Dad. With the 3 children correcting him every time he slips up, he will start getting the message.
     

Share This Page

- advertisement -

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice