- advertisement -

Ever have a party and no one came?

Discussion in 'Parents Off Topic' started by goochgirl, Nov 8, 2011.

  1. goochgirl

    goochgirl Approved members

    Joined:
    Jul 28, 2008
    Messages:
    1,788
    I just canceled my son's Bar Mitzvah. Not that he has been difficult, or undeserving. Not that he wasn't prepared. We scheduled it over a year ago for a holiday weekend when my husband's family was most likely able to attend. DS has adjusted to our move and made friends quickly at his new school. None of them were going to be able to attend because their families had plans for the holidays. This wasn't a surprise. It's a family event, anyway. Fine. So, after receiving regrets from a few people in his family, and no word from the rest, I started making calls. Apparently, no one had plans to come in. :mad: Just his 2 sisters. I canceled the whole thing today. We are going to reschedule for a time when my son's friends can come and give him an awesome celebration. DS is more than fine with this; he'd rather have his friends than family he doesn't really know and.... I won't go there. Unfortunately, for me, that means starting over with 2 months worth of work. Much of it can stay the same, but I have to start over with new invitations, sync dates, etc. Oh, and the yarmulkes we ordered were shipped.. and will arrive on Friday, now with the wrong date imprinted. If anyone has been dying to own a yarmulke shaped like a baseball for that Jewish funeral you might have to attend one day, I have several to send you.
     
  2. obtainedmist

    obtainedmist Approved members

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2010
    Messages:
    1,538
    Wow, not to mention learning a new torah portion...I hope he hasn't gone too far into the tutoring process! Also...even if the friends rsvp and say they'll come, we had a lot of no-shows.
     
  3. Sarah Maddie's Mom

    Sarah Maddie's Mom Approved members

    Joined:
    Sep 23, 2007
    Messages:
    12,521
    I'm so sorry. :( One of Maddie's best friends had her long planned, and long anticipated Bat Mitzvah the night that we, in New England, had a terrible and freaky October snow storm. Maddie and her posse made it, but of 96 guests I think only about 20 were able to get to the celebration. :(

    I hope your son gets to have his special day when he can celebrate with friends and family and be celebrated by the same. :cwds:
     
  4. bnmom

    bnmom Approved members

    Joined:
    Oct 26, 2010
    Messages:
    456
    Sorry to hear, that stinks! I hope when you reschedule his friends are available - if he's anything like my sons, those are the guests that will mean the most. Wishing him a happy celebration when it comes!
     
  5. selketine

    selketine Approved members

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 2006
    Messages:
    6,057
    My son was invited to a couple of them one year and both were planned around spring break and we were traveling.:( If you want to maximize the ability of the school friends to come I'd definitely look at the school calendar. I hope he has a wonderful celebration!:)
     
  6. goochgirl

    goochgirl Approved members

    Joined:
    Jul 28, 2008
    Messages:
    1,788
    This weekend was planned for the family. My husband's family, actually. Mine would be there at any time. DS will NOT be learning a second parshah. This was his second one, as he had his real leining (sp?) right after his birthday. It was a monday morning before school right after we moved here. It was our immediate family, my parents, and the usual Monday morning shachrit crowd. We served baegels and orange juice and coffee after. Then to school. Would you believe it was more meaningful than we could ever imagine. The people there knew my son for a month. They were there because they wanted to be there. Not for the party or obligation. I have a beautiful picture of my son, his father and grandfather. My son being my son. Not in his best suit. In his jeans and his polo shirt and sneakers.
    This party is being rescheduled. Not the dinner, not the aliya or kiddush lunch. Not doing it. Oh, yes, Carol, we will schedule it around his friends schedule. We are changing it to a teenage party. My rant is really toward DH's family. This was all done for them. Lesson learned. Will be done for my son. I should say sons, as I have another one to plan; my boys are only a year apart. :)
    Sarah, sorry about Maddie's friends' BatMi. That happened to a friends daughter. They had planned a BatMi in a hotel in Israel, and a few days before it was bombed. I suppose that, like wedding disasters and childbirth, the stories of what happened become more exciting of a memory than had all run smoothly. Our best childbirth story is the one where my DH didn't get there in time. No doubt the party that isn't will be talked about in my family for years to come.
     
  7. mom24grlz

    mom24grlz Approved members

    Joined:
    Mar 30, 2010
    Messages:
    1,799
    i'm so sorry :(. That is a big pet peeve of mine when people don't RSVP. And yes this actually happened to us. For Ashleigh's 6th birthday I invited all the girls in her kindergarten class, plus some girls from Sunday School and no one RSVP'd or even came to it :(. And I couldn't call anyone to see if they were coming, because the school isn't allowed to give out phone numbers. I ended up taking Ashleigh to chuck e cheese. I felt terrible, but she still had a fun time.
     
  8. mom2Hanna

    mom2Hanna Approved members

    Joined:
    Jul 6, 2008
    Messages:
    972
    That really stinks. As long as your son isn't unhappy I think you are doing the right thing. I wouldn't bother with inviting the family to the new one!
     
  9. sisterbeth43

    sisterbeth43 Approved members

    Joined:
    Oct 14, 2007
    Messages:
    2,908
    That is too bad! Some of my girls (Catholic) went to a few Bar Mitsvahs and they thought they were really impressive and of course the party after was also.
     
  10. Becky Stevens mom

    Becky Stevens mom Approved members

    Joined:
    Oct 14, 2008
    Messages:
    8,719
    I so wish we lived close still Gooch. We've never been to a Bar Mitzvah and would enjoy ourselves thoroughly!:) I agree that you should just invite friends next time and dont bother family members that cant seem to find the time for this very special day:rolleyes: (((hugs)))
     
  11. Bigbluefrog

    Bigbluefrog Approved members

    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2010
    Messages:
    563
    I was going to say the same thing, never been to one, and I would of came too.

    Your party will be great!!! sorry about the no rsvps, people can be forgetful.
     
  12. goochgirl

    goochgirl Approved members

    Joined:
    Jul 28, 2008
    Messages:
    1,788
    Oh, me too! I was just thinking that you still owed us that Thanksgiving visit ;) I was really sorry that we weren't able to coordinate another CT get-together. Those gals in Boston get to have all the fun :)
     

Share This Page

- advertisement -

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice