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Did anyone have another child soon after diagnosed?

Discussion in 'Parents of Children with Type 1' started by River'sMommy, Nov 1, 2009.

  1. River'sMommy

    River'sMommy New Member

    Oct 31, 2009
    Hi. :cwds: I'm new here and my 5 year old son River was just diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes on 10/20/09. But I'm panicking about something right now. I'm due in 2 weeks to have another baby and I'm really starting to doubt my ability to manage the new amount of care that River requires and a new baby. My husband is really a little uncomfortable doing Diabetes related care on his own. The only thing he is able to do on his own is check blood sugar. I'm sure he is able to do more than that but he just refuses to give himself credit. Has anyone gone through having a new baby soon after another child was diagnosed? Thanks.
  2. saxmaniac

    saxmaniac Approved members

    Jun 1, 2007
    Our daughter Kira was a few months old when Alex was dx'd.
  3. AlisonKS

    AlisonKS Approved members

    May 16, 2007
    I got pregnant six months after my sons diagnosis when he was a little over 2 years old-and got reallllly sick. Your dh just has to do it. I used to just go to the store, or do anything and leave my son alone with him, had my cell phone just in case. I made a list of everything, times, doses, carb counts to his fav foods. Do you have any other family to help while you are laboring? My mother in law went to classes, learned everything, and spent the night w/ Tony the night I went into labor. Now she takes him on the weekends :) It's not fair for you to do everything.
  4. Boo

    Boo Approved members

    Jan 6, 2006
    I agree. It is time for your husband to man up and learn what is needed to care for his child. ;) While it can be quite scary at first, he can handle it. Really, he has no choice, regardless of whether another child is coming into your family soon or not. It is what needs to be done. For everbody's sake.

    You will have a trying time ahead. The period following diagnosis is challenging, as is having a new baby (as we all well know)! All of those flying hormones won't help any. :p Keep the lines of communication open between yourself and your husband. Get him learning NOW, so that he will be prepared when the baby comes, which could, theoretically be any day now! And, stay positive with him--it sounds like he needs someone to encourage him rather than to criticize what he does which can often be the way it is when one spouse handles most of the care. Remember that there is "more than one way to skin a cat", as long as he is keeping your child safe.
  5. sam1nat2

    sam1nat2 Approved members

    Jan 24, 2007
    he's going to have to learn!!! No better time than the present:D I'm guessing you had to learn all that you know in a short amount of time, he's going to be able to do it too.

    There is someone on here whose little guy was just dx'd, I think her sn is JJ's mamma? Her little guy is under 2 and she just had another baby and she and the baby are in the hospital:(

    Congrats on the upcoming arrival!!! My first 2 are 5 years apart, the older kid sure can help out a lot!!
  6. Little Diabetic Dude

    Little Diabetic Dude Approved members

    Sep 7, 2009
    My ds was diagnosed in April this year and I had just given birth via a caesar and had another 2 other children at home.
    I gave up breastfeeding early( all my kids are very close in age all 4 born in 4 1/2 yrs). I honestly thought how would i cope with a newborn and would I still have had her knowing all this and what it comes down to is I would still have my Ds3 with Diabetes rather than not have him at all so what kicked in for me was to learn as much as I could accept support from friends and family and my DH was really good with the kids he had to be and just run with it. All your survival skills kick in and you make it through. My dd is now 8 mths it's been 6 mths from diagnosis we are on a pump and we are doing as a great as we can be with a toddler D. Don't doubt yourself, that child was given to you because you can handle it just look deep you will make it. I did.
    My ds3 is nearly two is a normal 2 yr old requires alot of care which I think I can only do best and have had to change a few of my work hours to cater for him but things seem to be working and I know I will get there in the end.
  7. momma_fish2007

    momma_fish2007 Approved members

    Aug 26, 2009
    My son was dxd on 10-19-08 and my daughter was born 11-11-08 so we had a few weeks to get things down. In my situation, we had my MIL in on things from the getgo and she watched Julian while we were in the hospital. Things are hectic but you'll manage.

    You should keep your eye out for JJsMomma too, her son was dxd only about a month or so ago and she just had her second son two weeks or so ago and her newborn had/has some trouble. She is managing beautifully! And so will you. Hormones may make you feel otherwise but it's not as bad as you think it will be. I know I was terrified though because Julian came 3 weeks before his due date and he was dxd about three weeks before his sister was due so I just KNEW history would repeat itself and Maddie would come while I was in the hospital with Julian's dx. Feel free to PM me anytime

    And wow, I was just looking at your dates and we are really close as far as dx from due date! That's kinda funny/interesting
  8. 2type1s

    2type1s Approved members

    Nov 23, 2008
    Zoe was born one month to the day after Morgan's dx (Morgan dx'd on July 20, 1999, and Zoe born on Aug. 20th.). Was is hard? Yes. My doctor actually scheduled an induction so that we could have my mother here, and no middle of the night emergencies. (I delivered Morgan in less than 2 hours from first contraction, pushed once...not a situation I cared to repeat). However, I started on my own the night before the induction and just went onto the hospital early. My mom went to education classess with us, my husband was in on everything from the get-go. I also had a good friend trained to take blood sugar, draw up shots (we didn't have the pens then) and give shots. We ended up needing her because my mom injured her leg and couldn't drive, so she didn't make it in until after Zoe had been born. Morgan was fine. We stayed in close contact by phone. And she had a great day with my girl friend! For ONE SECOND my husband suggested I "just go have this one without me.." He wanted to stay home and take care of Morgan. It took one look from me for him to realize how stupid of a statement that was. The first few weeks after Zoe was born were the happiest I can remember. I was so glad she was there, beautiful and perfect, and considered her my reward after a very bad summer.
  9. samheis

    samheis Approved members

    May 20, 2008
    My daughter came about 10 months after dx, so we were a bit more comfortable in management, but here are some things I did that helped.

    Stocked up on frozen dinners and prepackaged snacks and breakfast foods so dh wouldn't have to estimate carbs. (these were helpful the first few days home too, while I recovered and didn't want to deal with it either)
    Family came to the hospital to wait it out with us-Sam was able to hang out in the waiting room with them during the delivery, and they were just around the corner if any problems.
    The staff was really cool, and let Sam come back in the room while we waited, and then again after the baby came.
    I also let Sam run a little higher those few days. My mindset was that it was safer than having them have to deal with a low.
    Kept my cellphone, notebook, and calculator so I could keep up with his bg's, and my husband or mom could call when it was time to make a shot.
    Checked out the minute they would allow.

    It was tough, and a lot to think about when you are having a baby, and I was lucky that my husband really stepped up.

    Don't fret about it-it will be over soon, and you'll have your whole family under the same roof in no time. Congrats and Good Luck!
  10. mom2two

    mom2two Approved members

    Jan 3, 2008
    Yes. I became pregnant 3 months after my son was dx and I was nervous but also very excited. You are only 2 weeks into this, your husband will come around, expecially when the baby comes, he won't have a choice. Good luck and congrats!
  11. Becky Stevens mom

    Becky Stevens mom Approved members

    Oct 14, 2008
    Kayla, Steven is my youngest. I just wanted to say. Your husband is going to have to step up to the plate here and so is your family. You need all your strength to have a healthy, beautiful baby to add to your family. Please come in here too so that we can offer what support and advice that we can.
  12. Colleen

    Colleen Approved members

    Apr 18, 2008
    I had a 2 week old baby when Erik was diagnosed. My husband stayed with Erik at night and I came to the hospital in the morning. It involves a lot of teamwork and it can be done. Support each other it is definitely trying times. We are here for you.
  13. giddyup_go

    giddyup_go Approved members

    Dec 15, 2008
    I was 14 weeks pregnant with our youngest (and 6th! baby) when my oldest daughter was dx last December. My hormones were running high and I was devestated. I thought then that had I known she would be dx'd, I would NOT have tried for this baby. :-( I know that I had 5 months to prepare myself for a new baby afterward, and you only have a few weeks, but it was doable. My biggest issue was finding someone to watch my daughter while I was in labor. Unfortunately I was not able to and she had to go to the hospital with us. She is 11 though, and that would make a big difference.

    Sorry I don't have a lot of wisdom to offer. Just commiseration from a mom who has BTDT. I'm sorry you're having to deal with all of this at this time too. Pregnancy and new baby is enough of a stressor without adding a dx like D into the mix.

    I'll be thinking of you. :cwds:
  14. Zanesmommy

    Zanesmommy Approved members

    Jul 14, 2008
    I just wanted to "ditto" what everyone else said.

    I was 5 months pregnant with Savannah when Zane was dx. We scheduled an induction so we would be able to plan as much as possible. We had Savannah 10 days before my due date.

    My Brother and SIL took care of Zane during the day while we were having the baby and my husband took care of him that night. He always has had a hard time with medical stuff, but when it comes to Zane he does what has to be done. He knows it HAS to be done and that's that.

    Your husband will have to learn. Or you need to find someone else you can trust to help out.

    You will be fine to manage the baby and D once you are home. The baby will sleep a lot in the beginning (hopefully). And you will always have support here on CWD. :)

    Good luck with the delivery!
  15. betty6333

    betty6333 Approved members

    Aug 20, 2008
    I was pregnant with baby # 4 at DX. It wasn't easy having a pregnancy, and a newborn right while learning the D ropes, but we managed.
    It will be ok, and you will figure out what will work for you, but is isn't easy that is for sure. :cwds: It will be ok!
  16. mom2Hanna

    mom2Hanna Approved members

    Jul 6, 2008
    I was 6 wks pregnant when Hanna was dxd. I lost that baby exactly a month after. I got pregnant again a few months later. Its different as my daughter is older. I did tell all 3 of my kids they could be at the hospital but only Hanna wanted to be there. It made it easier for me to have her there with us, less worry. While I tend to do everything for her that she doesn't do herself, my husband did pretty well while I was in the hospital.
  17. Melissa

    Melissa Approved members

    Jun 15, 2009
    Connor was 5 months old when Maddie was dx at 37months.

    Life was just crazy for 6 months and I just had to go with it. My house was a mess and I didn't cook homemade meals. My goals for each day while DH was at work wwas:
    -make sure everyone was fed (& got insulin!)
    -make sure everyone has clean diapers (or pull-ups)
    -make sure everyone took a nap!!!

    Your DH will step up, he won't have a choice. There will be times you just won't be able to do everything.

    I did learn how to nurse Connor at the playground, while checking Maddie's BG, while holding a conversation with other moms - all the while keeping boob covered. It was my new favorite skill!
  18. jsmom

    jsmom Approved members

    Sep 30, 2009
    Hi- I am Jsmom , not jjsmom although we had similar experiences it seems. My 7 yr old daughter was dx last Feb when I was 36 weeks pregnant with #4The 3 others all came early and I wa having contractions while in the hospital with Julia, but #4 must have known he should wait and was born 2 days after his due date, so a month after dx, without any complications. I had primary care duty for the time after dx until the baby, but my husband would do the shots every now and then. When I was in the hospital he was able to manage to count the carbs and do the shots. While I was in the hospital they ate a lot of prepackaged foods that came with carb counts and simple serving sizes. It was hard for me to believe someone else could do my job, but he did fine. Have your husband start with shot a day and then he and your son will be more comfortable with it. My biggest fear was going into labor and not having someone around who could do shots/count carbs. I ended up going into labor in the afternoon and once I got to the hospital and they checked how far along I was, hubby drove home, feed the other kids, gave Julia her regular shot and lantus and then came back to the hospital-I wouldn't recommend that method! I would recommend finding a local support group- I found one through the JDRF website and the people in the group are amazing, I am sure that someone in your local area will offer to help you out. The dx is awful, but I was actually glad it happened when it did because I was home on maternity leave and newborns sleep alot! Good luck- it will get easier.
  19. Emma'sDad

    Emma'sDad Approved members

    Oct 10, 2006
    It took us 2 years... well 2 years - 9 months to get back onto the original plan of having 2 children after DX. I am sure you can handle the two tasks together. Emma was 5 when Zoe was born. She was great at helping out, ie: giving the bottle while we did the dishes, getting things across the room like blankies, toys and diapers, etc. It gets them involved and they like feeling like they're needed.
  20. Andy'sMom

    Andy'sMom Approved members

    Jan 16, 2008
    My second was born 8 months after Andy's dx (found out while still in hospital ... I thought it was just the stress of PICU, DKA, but nope ... new baby was on the way!). I think your hubby is going to have to step up. It does get easier and the first few weeks after dx are the craziest, but you will need help from him, as you'll be primarily caring for the new little one. You'll do fine but if you can get outside help (parents, in-laws, friends) it'll help. You guys can do it!! CWD website is here if you need help/need to vent! BTW, Andy is also 5 so I know the challenges!!

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