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dazed and confused

Discussion in 'Parents of Children with Type 1' started by meg'smom, Nov 28, 2006.

  1. meg'smom

    meg'smom Approved members

    Nov 28, 2006
    hi,, all
    I'm new and very sad and still in a state of disbelief... My 6 year old daughter was diagnosed 2 weeks ogo with type 1..
    It's alot to take in at once, really hoping things will get easier.
    She is handling all of this better than I am,, but I'm not sure she understands
    how long forever is.. Could really us some words of hope right now if anyone has any.. thanxs
  2. Momof4gr8kids

    Momof4gr8kids Approved members

    Sep 3, 2006
    Hi Meg's mom, Welcome to the CWD board. I am sorry to hear about Meg's diagnosis. It feels like the world will come to an end at any moment when you hear those words......

    My daughter Julia is 5, soon to be 6. She was dx'd in Jan of this year, and sometimes, when I think about the word forever all hope leaves. I am sorry to say that it doesn't become easier, but it does become more routine, and I guess not thinking about it all of the time does make it easier.

    (((Big hugs))) to you all. I hope you are still taking care of yourself, and trying to relax some. I know, easier said then done, but you need it in order to be there for your DD.

  3. earruda

    earruda Approved members

    Feb 13, 2006


    I have a daughter who is 12, diagnosed 2 years ago. I promise you that it does get easier. Life will be good again.. never quite the same but still very, very good. With the right care she will live a long and healthy life. It has taken me two years to really be able to talk about our journey and believe these words. Diabetes is very scary. You will go through many stages of grief... why my child? Why not me? Was it my fault? Will she be OK? I have learned a tremendous amount from watching Margo walk with courage...never letting diabetes define her. I am happy to help be your guide....one mother to another. One of the best things we did was send Margo to diabetes camp. I can't tell you what a confidence builder it was for her. Today is a bad day but I promise there are better days coming.

    Elizabeth Arruda
    Rockland, Maine
  4. Flutterby

    Flutterby Approved members

    Nov 11, 2006
    I'm so sorry to hear of your dd diagnosis.. I am glad that you have found this board.. everyone here is so helpful and nice..

    Things definitely do get easier.. does it make it easier to accept.. no.. but things do get better..

    My daughter Kaylee was diagnosed 1/31 of this year, so we are about 10months into diagnosis.. its not easier to accept.. I still hate the fact that she has this disease.. but so glad that we have treatment for her.. in the beginning there is just so much to learn, so much information that you are trying to process all at once.. its tough.. once you get the basics down and you trust yourself to make decision on insulin doses and carb counting things will go back to as normal as they can..

    was your dd put in the hospital or are you doing outpatient treatment? we caught Kaylee early enough that she wasn't put in the hospital but for a few weeks we were at the pedi endo's office learning.. I also researched the internet as much as I could.. she is only 3 (dx 1month before her 3rd b-day) so she doesn't understand a whole lot.. and doesn't get the concept of 'forever' and I think she definitely takes it better that we parents do..

    if you have any questions, please ask away, everyone is very knowledgable here:)

    welcome to the board that no one really wants to belong too ;)
  5. meg'smom

    meg'smom Approved members

    Nov 28, 2006
    thanks for the kind words,,
    meg was not hospitalized we caught it early, so it's outpatients treatment.
    I think it's even harder for all of us because she was;t sick..
    not sure why all the fuse when she felt o.k before.
    Just the usual signs.. thirsty , hunger, tired and peeing alllll the time!!
    I just keep hoping I will wake from what seems to me at this time as a nightmare..
  6. Flutterby

    Flutterby Approved members

    Nov 11, 2006
    I thought (and hoped) for the longest time that her dr would call us and tell us they made a mistake..obviously thats not the case.. but at first.. iwas really really hoping!

  7. allisa

    allisa Approved members

    Jan 13, 2006
    I started to espond to this about 10 different ways......and couldn't find the right thing to say because 4 years after dx......I am still dealing with the whirlwind of emotions !

    Part of me wants to curl up and cry with you.

    Part of me wants to give you the :D pep talk :D about how your daughter will become acustomed to this and so will you and you will BOTH surprise yourselves at how far you have come.

    Part of me wants to ignore anthing Diabetes related and just skip this thread altoghether becuase I don't want to relive my emotions that I THOUGHT were under control !

    Part of me wants to sit and educate.....give you abunch of links to all sorts of cool stuff

    Part of me wants to say...."Diabetes isn't the worst thing that can happen to a child"

    And Part of me wants to retort...."Diabetes isn't the best thing that can happen to a child, either"

    but mostly I guess I'd like to give you a cyber-hug and say " Yes, this is tough, scary, overwhelming & frustrtating. And you WILL be AMAZED by your daughter and her capacity to accept this disease and move onto the business of being a kid"

    Diabetes ( any illness really ) will set your priorties straight and make you focus on what's important. You may find yourself irritated or surprised by friends who are worrying over trivial matters ( which you may have once worried over yourself in your past life).

    Welcome to the site.....

    Here is my favorite poem by Emily Kinglsey.....she is a mom who has a son with Down syndrome....Diabetes & Down syndrome are not the same....but the surprise of the dx brings out the same emotions......

    I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......

    When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

    After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

    "Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

    But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

    The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

    So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

    It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

    But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

    And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss.

    But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.

  8. Tori's Mom

    Tori's Mom Approved members

    Nov 26, 2006
    Hi Meg's mom,
    I'm very sorry. You and I are nearly identically in the same boat. My 6 yeart old DD was diagnosed yesterday.
    I am still swimming with emotions and I expect that will not stop any time soon.
    In the few days I've been searching for info, this forum has been a wealth of knowledge, caring and compassion.
  9. Treysmom

    Treysmom Approved members

    Sep 23, 2006
    Meg's Mom and Tori's mom. Big !!!!!!! HUGS!!!!!!! to you both!! There are so

    many emotions that you will go through, just remember there are people here

    to support you. We are 3 months into this new life and most of the time its

    routine checking bg's and giving insulin. There will be times when you want

    to scream, cry and just plain mope about it. We are all here for you! As you

    will be here for us. God Bless!!
  10. TaeandTiff

    TaeandTiff Approved members

    Feb 7, 2006
    It is more harder for the parents, than the child. I know this first hand being once the child with type 1 then the parent of a T1 Toddler. It will get easier then one day you look up and you are back to how you felt at dx, then back to being easier. And, I do not believe that this is forever, I know there will be a cure in our lifetimes. I believe this to my core. Just use your childs courage and the knowledge that will come to you to manage this.
    Welcome to the family:cwds:
    many many hugs
    and it is ok to cry!:)
  11. bethdou

    bethdou Approved members

    Dec 29, 2005
    Tori's Mom and Meg's Mom (hey, I'm a Meg's mom too!;) )

    It's not quite the same as in person, but
    {{{{{{{{big hugs}}}}}}}}
    to both of you.

    Don't know what else to say except thatI know neither one of you wants to be here - none of us do. Just know that whenever you want to cry, rant, rave, gripe, whine, ask ?s, yell, whatever......there's a whole bunch of us here for you both. Whether you're having a completely crappy, lousy day, or it goes great, there's a shoulder to "cry" on or a hand to give you a cyber-pat on the back.....I don't think I would have made it through the last year without this site. (Thanks again, Jeff!!)
  12. lynn

    lynn Approved members

    Sep 2, 2006
    Meg's mom and Tori's mom,
    I'm so sorry for your loss. I know that sounds like something you hear when somebody dies. In the beginning that is what has happened though. I felt like all the the "normal" things that would be in the future for my son were dead. He was only two at the time and I couldn't quit looking at him thinking about all that he wouldn't be able to do. He loves playing ARMY with his brothers--that would never be a possibility for real life. Would he be able to father children? You know the commercials...
    Would he become blind or disabled?
    Would I be able to keep him alive? I know it scared the heck out of me.
    It gets better. We don't own the future. I am learning so much about loving and appreciating today. My little guy has taught me about doing the hard stuff with bravery and a smile.
    I'm sorry you are going through this. It feels so awful. There is a future and hope on the other side of the darkness.
  13. Emma'sDad

    Emma'sDad Approved members

    Oct 10, 2006
    Emma was 3.5 when we found out about a year ago. At first she was like, when am I going to stop taking needles, when will I be better? That's when you use the word forever. I think she gets it now because it's so routine for her now that if we go 5 minutes after we usually give her the needle, she reminds us. Of course, she sometimes surprise us with comments like, "when I'll be a mommy, I won't have diabetic anymore." Maybe it's wishful thinking.

    To quote a famous man, "keep your chin up, and keep your stick on the ice" really applies to diabetes. Never look at the puck because in that split second you do, you will get checked. Stay ahead of the game and go for that net. Takes a Canadian to come up with an analogy like that eh?

    Seriously, welcome aboard, not that you wanted to join. We're all in the same boat and understand what you are going through and have great advice if you have any questions. Just be happy that you found this board when you did... Took me over a year to find this and really wished I could have found it back then because DW and I were a wreck.
  14. Kirsten

    Kirsten Approved members

    Oct 17, 2006
    Torismom and megsmom,

    (((hugs))) Welcome to the group. We all know the rocky road that you're both on now. The first year is especially rough, but it does get better. Please ask us anything. We're here to help!


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