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Daughter of Uncontrolled Type 1.. ah!

Discussion in 'Spouses and Significant Others' started by RHLynne68, Mar 10, 2008.

  1. RHLynne68

    RHLynne68 New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2008
    Messages:
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    Hello There,

    Thank you for taking the time to read this.

    I am a 22 years old, and have had type 1 diabetes since age 11.
    My mother, whom I live with at the time, also has type 1 diabetes for 15+ years. I also live with my mother's boyfriend who is non-diabetic.

    The problem lies in my complete frustration, anger and worry with the uncontrolled diabetes of my mother. I know it must be frustrating and worrisome for my mom and her boyfriend as well- but it is rarely talked about or dealt with.

    She wears a pump and tests often, which is great, but still has little control over her blood sugars. She is not allowed to drive anymore due to 2 car accidents which resulted in having to get new cars (no major injuries for anyone though, thank goodness). My mom's boyfriend and I drive her to work and shopping and anywhere else she needs to go, which is fine. I do not want her on the road for her sake as well as other drivers sakes. She cannot tell when she is getting a low blood sugar and quickly loses all ability to be rational during these times.

    Lately she has been "waking up" with very low blood sugars which result in gluogon shots, orange juice and lots of combative fighting, seziures and hateful words thrown at me and her boyfriend. I know how it feels to have a low blood sugar as I am diabetic myself, and it hurts to see her this way. It hurts my feelings too when I am bitten, called names and hit when I am just trying to help her. When she recovers she has little to no knowledge of what had just occured.

    She has a doctor but will not let us go with her. I do not know what she is saying to her doctor, because nothing really changes. I encourage her to beg for a continous monitoring sensor or anything else that will help her. I know that she is upset about this, and feels very helpless and well as guilty. She does not know what to do.

    I do not know what to do.

    My mom's boyfriend helps little and does not talk to her or me about it really. He helps get juice and things, but not much else. When I am away, he will call me to ask what to do when my mom is low. I can't do everything from the phone, and 911 has to be called.

    Sorry this is so long.

    What do you think I should do about this? How can I get through to both of them that I too need help and support and communication regarding my moms dire need? Any advice would be much appreicated.

    Thank you,
    Lynne
     
  2. OSUMom

    OSUMom Approved members

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    Lynne,

    I'm so sorry this sounds like a horribly difficult situation. My heart goes out to you and your mom. It really seems like there is only so much you can do, and then that leaves you so frustrated. It's obvious how much you love your mom and how much this concerns you. I'll keep your mom and you in my prayers. I'm sorry I don't have advice, but know that we're here for you. Often times parents are in this situation. You're such a loving daughter, and thank you for taking care of yourself. Keep us posted. We care. :cwds::cwds:
     
  3. Tamara Gamble

    Tamara Gamble Approved members

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    Lynn, I don't have any great advice either. Your mom obviously needs to drop her basals. There is a really great book called Pumping Insulin by John Walsh fourth edition. I would suggest buying this book for her and helping her understand how, what, when and why. Maybe she will start adjusting her basals as well as insulin to carb ratios. I think you are already doing what you should. You are being a great example to her.

    God Bless!

    Tami
     
  4. rachabetic

    rachabetic Approved members

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    I'm very sorry about the situation that you are in. Something good that she should try, concidering she cannot tell when she is going low, is the cgms. this would warn you or her, that her bg was dropping, or low already. this would save you the trouble of the glucagon, seizures, 911 calls, and everything else that comes with her lows. i hope this helps, and good luck!
     
  5. blbrocky

    blbrocky Approved members

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    410
    Lynne,

    Can you work with your mom and may be check her basal settings on the pump? It sounds like some adjustments are in order. If she doesn't have the book Pumping Insulin by John Walsh she should consider purchasing a copy.

    I'm so sorry you are having to deal with this...... Your mom is lucky to have you. Hang in there.
     
  6. RHLynne68

    RHLynne68 New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2008
    Messages:
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    Thank you so much for your posts. Your support has truly helped my family and I. My mother and I are now working with her doctor in getting a continuous sensor for her. (She has allowed me to finally come with her). Having a family member with her has helped the doctor understand her situation better. I think my mom is feeling better too knowing that I am not angry and her, just the diabetes situation. Together we are trying to recognize lows better so it doesn't get too crazy every time. One day at a time, one test at a time!
     

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