Hi my name is Chrystelle and my daughter Cassidy was diagnoised on Dec. 16 2009, talk about a crappy early christmas gift. Cassidy had been complaining of tummy aches and headaches for awhile but every time I took her to the doc they never found anything, mind you they never did a urine test or took blood cause she was deathly afraid of needles. Then that week I noticed she was peeing a lot more then usual, thinking it was a UTI I sat her up with the doc and we got the test done. I will forever remember how pale he looked when he came in the room and told me she had sugar in her urine. Her doc was mine when I was a kid, and it seam liked it hit him harder then it hit me at that moment. We managed to pin her down long enough to poke her finger for the first time to find out that she was at 379. I thought that was super high but after reading some other folks stories I feel so blessed it was as low as it was. She only had 5 ketones i think they said. Her doc told us to head over to the childrens hospital and go straight to the ER. Where once again we had to hold her down for the IV and more poking. Its so hard to explain to a 9 year old that she will need pokes and needles for the rest of her life, and all I felt that I could do was keep a brave face for her and hide my worry. I dont remember crying once during the following week. I do remember my anger at my dad's friend for saying that I shouldn't have her on insulin cause they got pills for that now, and trying to in vain to explain she was a type one and her body had attacked its self. Almost thought it would be easier to hit my head on a brick wall. We have been trudging along with our new normal, tho the bad luck continued with our car breaking down and getting screwed over on a different one. I was always staying up beat and positive in front of my girls. Yet at night when my angels are sleeping I am crying hoping that this is all a bad dream, praying it all goes away, yet knowing that it wont. Wondering if I will ever get another night of sleep again. Knowing that right now she is honeymooning and her numbers are going all over, and she has had a few lows at night keep me paranoid that I might not catch one. Finally will catch a few ZZZ's when I know the hubby will be up and able to watch her and catch her. It don't seam fair, but she has been a trooper. Wanting to test herself, telling me when she is low, still not able to tell when she is feeling high but I can tell by her attitude. Even wants to give her own shots but I am still leary of that since the few times we have tried she pulls the pen out too soon. I am heart broken over what I feel she has lost, given she looks so much better then she did before we found out, and I am so glad we now know. But I miss how carefree she could be before. Deep down I know it gets better, but when does it get better? When does the worry dim so you can get a good nights sleep again?