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"Bad" blood sugars

Discussion in 'Parents of Children with Type 1' started by Brenda, Sep 14, 2012.

  1. Brenda

    Brenda Junior Member

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    In reading some of the recent threads, I noticed that a few people referred to "bad" blood sugars. Over the years, we have learned that it is important to choose one's words carefully, that referring to bad blood sugars in the presence of a child can make that child think he has been "bad." Granted, there are times when a child can deliberately not check his/her BG before dosing, not dosed insulin properly, etc., but, in general, high or low blood sugars are not BAD. In fact, they are what they are and there are many factors that contribute to them being high or low. So, my point is that we parents need to try to erase "bad blood sugars" from our vocabulary, in my opinion. Instead, let's say high/elevated or low. Similarly, when you encounter high blood sugars, refrain from saying What did you do/eat?" and instead say, "Let's try to figure out why you are so high and fix it." I remember doing this a few times myself (bad parent moment that we all have).
     
  2. Beach bum

    Beach bum Approved members

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    Agreed.

    Blood sugars are high, low, just right, frustrating, curious, tricky. It is what it is and what is important is to learn why they are like they are. Did you over bolus, under bolus, not bolus at all?

    In addition the actions that may have caused the blood sugars to be what they are also are not bad. Frustrating, infuriating...yes. Bad, no. Try walking a day in our kids shoes. Think about every single piece of food you eat and write down the carbs. It's a PIA, it's a nuisance, but it's a necessary thing that they have to do, but they are only human and they forget. My daughter is 11 now and more self managing. She will test, bolus if necessary, eat the snack and then forget to bolus for the food:eek: What can you do? A helpful reminder of how important it is to bolus. But, if she does remember to do everything, I always make sure to thank her for taking the time to help me out by checking and dosing.

    IMO a better approach is "hmmm I wonder what's up? Can you give me some ideas why your BG is X?"

    The term "bad blood sugars" always reminds me of people who say "oh my granny had the sugars bad.":cwds:
     
  3. nanhsot

    nanhsot Approved members

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    Ok, but to be fair what comes out online is not what comes out of the mouth. I referred to bad numbers in a recent thread but I certainly never call them that in front of my son, or even in questioning him.

    Typical scenario in our house: "how's your sugar this morning?" as he leaves for football. "little high, 190."
    "OK, how do you feel, do you need a ride?"
    "nope, I'm good."
    "Did you treat last night, have a low or anything, or have any idea why you are high this morning?"
    "yeah, I snacked before I went to bed and probably didn't bolus enough".
    "OK, have a good practice".

    That's a very typical conversation. I would never say "why do you have such a bad number?" That's just...awkward to say out loud anyway, clearly a number is not bad, it's just a number.

    I guess my point is that you can't extrapolate from online words that the same words are coming out of mouths and being heard by our kids.
     
  4. KatieSue

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    I was bad at saying when seeing a high number either "what did you eat" or "did you forget to bolus". Which is accusatory. I've tried to switch to a more neutral "what do you think happened?"

    I've also tried to say more "good job" to a good number and less of anything about a high/low one other than to see if there's a reason and to treat.
     
  5. Sarah Maddie's Mom

    Sarah Maddie's Mom Approved members

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    On the forum one can use the word "bad" in quotes to make a point about the direction of a particular conversation or comment. It doesn't mean that one either uses the term, or thinks in those terms.
     
    Last edited: Sep 14, 2012
  6. caspi

    caspi Approved members

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    Well said, Brenda. I think it is important to realize that there are going to be days when for no rhyme or reason we just can't get the #'s in range, especially if you have a child going through puberty like I do! :eek:

    I am grateful that, because of CWD, I learned early on not to drill my son about his #'s the minute he walked in from school. We talk, he unloads his backpack, and then he usually brings them up while he's writing them down in the notebook we keep in the kitchen. And if he doesn't, I don't ask - I just check the PDM later. ;)
     
  7. L101418

    L101418 Approved members

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    I think it was here that someone posted

    "I'm grateful for the numbers because they tell us what to do."

    It really helped me.
     
  8. CAGrandma

    CAGrandma Approved members

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    And maybe parents should also remember that we're not really 'bad parents' when we say/do things that are not what we'd like to do/say.
     
  9. Sarah Maddie's Mom

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    :cool: love this
     
  10. Mimi

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    I'm guilty of this. I certainly don't mean it to be accusatory, but I realize it can sound that way at times. :(

    We have little jokes about numbers that we use over and over again and probably aren't funny to anyone but us. For instance, all the literature we got from pump companies when we were deciding on a pump would show meters with a bg of 5.2 mmol/l (93 mg/dl). So anytime dd tests and gets this number we celebrate with a high five because she's "perfect." She's knows it's just in fun. We do similar things with higher numbers to lighten it up.

    Great reminder, Brenda. :cwds:
     
  11. TheFormerLantusFiend

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    While I wouldn't want my parents to call my blood sugars bad (or even good), I can call them whatever I want, and that definitely includes bad when they are bad for my health, inconvenient for my situation, or just not what I wanted.

    Sometimes my blood sugars are bad. Not just higher or lower than yours, but bad- because they make me feel bad no matter what they are called.
     
  12. GaPeach

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    Similar conversation at our house. I also might add, "Just trying to see where the high is coming from before we adjust basals or bolus..." That opens the door for honesty about a missed bolus. Hate to increase basal and then get lows.
     
  13. Mish

    Mish Approved members

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    yes! sometimes, let's face it, they ARE bad. Not bad in a "omg you did something wrong!" way, but bad in that they're not optimal for you, for your health, and not optimal for how you feel. My son calls them bad, (not good) or good all the time. I tend to be more of the "woopsie, that's not right." group.

    I think there's a bid difference between "bad" as in "bad dog!" and "bad" as in "not in range". If the language in your family differentiates between those, then call it whatever you want. :)
     
  14. MamaC

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    When we see one of those stupendous low numbers, my standard reaction is, "Oooooh, that's a good one!"
     
  15. kyle and ryans mom

    kyle and ryans mom Approved members

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    We use good, bad, high, low, in range, out of range...whatever. My son knows that he is not "bad" for numbers that are not so great no matter what we call them. He is even starting to say things like "I think I am high because I had pizza for lunch" or "I think we should give less insulin at dinner because I played hard at recess today". I love that at 8 years old he is already starting to think about these things. That is what is important to me.
     
  16. Ellen

    Ellen Senior Member

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    So grateful to Dr. Richard Rubin who said many times at CWD FFL

    "There is one and only one acceptable response when your child tells you bg is high." "THANK YOU FOR CHECKING." Then you work from there to get it back to target. This was transformational for our relationship with our son.
     
  17. Beach bum

    Beach bum Approved members

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    I remember you posting this years ago and it is a rule we live by.
    "Thank you for taking the time to check." Acknowledge the number and move on.
     
  18. MomofSweetOne

    MomofSweetOne Approved members

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    YES!!! There's no way that anyone is going to convince me that numbers that make my daughter feel wretched are just numbers. We have fun coming up with as many synonyms for those awful numbers as we can. It takes some of the grr out of them for both of us.
     

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