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Young Jr in the fall

Discussion in 'Parents of Teens' started by jetsmom, Aug 15, 2010.

  1. jetsmom

    jetsmom Approved members

    Jan 2, 2008
    My son is 15 and will be a Jr. in highschool this fall. He's one of the youngest kids in his grade so therefore his friends are already 16 some even 17 and driving!

    So I'm slowly trying to let go and allow him to start going out with his friends (within reason). Today he asked to go with some buddies fishing. His friend who is 17 has been driving the boat for years.

    I was hesitant at first, but then I thought, in 2 years I'll be driving him to college, he'll have to have some life skills behind him. I trust he will take care of his D, that is becoming secondary at this stage of his life. I worry about other peer pressures at this point (drinking, sex, drugs).

    What would you do?
  2. Amy C.

    Amy C. Approved members

    Oct 22, 2005
    Have you spoken to him about the peer pressure of drinking, sex or drugs? Do you know the teen who is driving the boat?

    I am not sure I would allow my son to do this. There is a big difference in the decision making skills of 15-17 as compared to college aged of 18-21. Both groups can make poor decisions, but it seems an adult ought to be around even with the aged group.

    The biggest way to stay away from drugs and drinknig is not to be in a situation where something like this would happen. It isn't as though your son could walk away if they started doing something that made him uncomfortable while out in the boat.

    I would look for other opportunites than this one.
  3. caseifici

    caseifici Approved members

    Mar 24, 2010
    I agree 15 is a little young to be out on a boat without adult supervision, with or with or without D. JMO
  4. PatriciaMidwest

    PatriciaMidwest Approved members

    Mar 2, 2010
    I feel for you. It is SO hard sometimes to give our teens the freedom they want, and D complicates things, as much as we don't want it to.

    I don't know what my answer would be. Here are some questions that run thru my mind:

    How isolated is the lake? Is it a residential lake that the friend lives on?
    How much other boat traffic is on the lake?
    How responsible are both boys?
    Can you talk to the older boy about D care and hypo signs?
    Is your son willing to wear a life jacket on the boat? (Is this wishful thinking?)
    Is your son aware of his lows?
    How long would they be on the boat?
    Were other kids joining them?

    Is that enough questions?

    If I did let him go he would need to text me his numbers at a predetermined time.

    How did the fishing trip go?
  5. jetsmom

    jetsmom Approved members

    Jan 2, 2008
    Thank-you all for your replies.

    Yes, we talk frequently about drinking, drugs and sex. I make it very clear to him each time he goes to a gathering that he needs to walk away if inappropriate behavior is happening and to call me for a ride, no questions asked...........well maybe the next day.

    The boys he went out with are all his baseball friends, they know his D condition.

    He is aware of his lows, fortunately, and he brought his D bag with him.

    All went well, they had fun, no caught fish, returned home safely after spending time to clean the boat.
  6. wdhinn89

    wdhinn89 Approved members

    Mar 31, 2007
    We are going through the exact same thing as you right now. My son just turned 16 last week and will be a junior in Sept. It is really hard to let go. But we have to. They need to be prepared for college in two years and the real, unsheltered world that is out there.
    Thank God my son is a good kid and is surrounded by good friends but we all know that at some point in time our children are going to encounter other kids who drink, smoke, take drugs, etc. Hopefully with our talks and guidence, they have the smarts to walk away and remove themselves from the situation.

    All we can do is guide them and pray alot. That's our jobs.

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