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why alcohol is a problem

Discussion in 'Parents of Teens' started by wilf, Dec 8, 2012.

  1. MamaC

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    He maintains there's no relationship. I believe he's not accounting for the delayed lows properly.

    And, as of yesterday, I am no longer a parent of a teen, so this is better placed in the college subforum.
     
  2. jilmarie

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    This. My parent's didn't buy me alcohol or encourage me to drink, but we talked about the risks. They made sure I knew I could count on them for a ride or for help if I needed it, no questions asked. I'm not saying that works with every family, but it was very comforting to me.

    I was a responsible straight A student with a full ride to college. I drank occasionally prior to turning 21. I drank enough to be intoxicated occasionally. The vast majority (72%) of high school students have tried alcohol. Thinking "this won't happen to me or my teen" is irresponsible. You must talk to them. Not just "Don't drink, it's dangerous" but "If you choose to drink, here's how to do it most responsibly". Please at least tell them to eat something uncovered before bed.
     
  3. MamaC

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    Yes, this.
     
  4. danismom79

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    That includes being prepared for the possibility that (general) you don't have this down to a science, and every drinking night may not go as you hoped and planned.
     
  5. wdhinn89

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    Totally Agree ;)
     
  6. KatieSue

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    My kiddo is 16. She's very curious about alcohol. Luckily so far she's in with a group of friends who aren't interested in partying. I have no delusion that this won't change.

    I've let her try sips of a few drinks when I've had them. So far she can't stand the taste of any of it. Of course I pick things for her to try like bourbon, martinis, not yummy fruity drinks ;).

    We've talked multiple times and will continue to do so about the added implications of drinking and T1.

    I've also told her until she is of age I won't be providing her any alcohol. She can go find someone to buy for her just like everyone else had to. I really don't understand the parents who think it's ok to have parties for their teens. I also think there's a huge difference between allowing a half a glass of wine with dinner (we were allowed this growing up on special occasions) and a bottle of vodka.

    She also knows that should she make the decision to drink, I'd rather know about it and be able to take precautions than have her hide it. I'd of course hope she wouldn't but honestly at her age my friends and I drank quite a bit and often.

    I guess the message I try to convey to her is that I want her to be safe. I don't encourage nor approve of her drinking. But should she decide to make that choice, then I'll help walk her through the ramifications.
     
  7. C6H12O6

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    The drinking age is 19 here. I mentioned that if this was even documented at a diabetes / medical appointment that the clinician might even be legally obligated to our equivalent to child protective services because the parent is basically enabling a minor in this situation

    This post seems more like a cry for help because the OP is ethically conflicted on some level about the behaviour. At least at a subconscious level.
     
    Last edited: Dec 12, 2012
  8. TheFormerLantusFiend

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    Just want to say that I was drinking at 17 when I was diagnosed, I was asked about my drinking habits by every doctor I saw from my diagnosis to the end of my initial hopsitalization, I answered honestly that I did drink (though not frequently), the drinking age here is 21, and nobody called child protective services or anything like that.
    Admittedly, I wasn't going on benders on a regular basis- but about two to four times per year on holidays, I would drink two to five cups of wine. And that's what I told them, and nobody raised so much as an eyebrow.
     
  9. skimom

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    Wow - what a conversation.
    I have two kids with diabetes - one now 22 the other 17. Starting at about age 16 , their diabetic nurses and doctors talked to them about alcohol etc and the effects they might expect - this is not condoning the use of alcohol, it is just being realistic and being sure that we all have the tools and information to deal with a probable situation.
    As far as my kids and drinking - yes I know it happens- I do not buy them liquor, I do not supply it etc but I am also wise enough to know that I can't bury my head in the sand and think it doesn't happen.I am far from being a perfect parent and I know my kids will do things that I may not approve of - that is being realistic.On that same note, I do make sure that they have rides (whether it is via parent taxi or paid taxis) or stay put where they are. If they call for a ride or use their credit cards to pay for a taxi, there is never any any judgement on our part - I would rather get the call for the ride than a knock on my door from the police.....I make sure I know where they are and with whom. I talk to their friends about how important it is to contact us at any time if something doesn't seem right. I try talk to my kids during the night out to be sure they are ok. Their friends know they are diabetic and know that alcohol might be a concern for them.I test them when they get home and through the nite as required. My son is off at university and unless he is home visiting,I don't have this same luxury but I do know that his friends watch out for him as I have seen it in action.
    Some of the other comments made here are absolutely ludicrous. THe comment about alcohol consumption at 16 and sexual precociousness is quite frankly insulting and that will be my only comment.
    Alcohol consumption is alcohol consumption - regardless of the country involved. The younger drinking ages in Europe and Canada, in my opinion tend to remove a lot of the need to binge that is apparently noted by many of you in the US as alcohol is not the great forbidden fruit. (On a side note, I find it interesting that in the USA at the age of 18 you can fight/die for your country and vote but you can't be trusted to responsibly have a drink...sounds rather hypocritical to me). Recall that Europe- and many parts of Canada also have VERY strict rules re drinking and driving - approaching if not reaching a level of ZERO tolerance.
    As far as talking to a doctor about drinking and having them call social services - give me a break. Don't you think that they would rather have the opportunity to educate and inform?
    Wilf tried to start a thread where he was ,in my opinion, highlighting the need to be aware and educated - both as parents and as "drinkers" to minimize any issues that might arise with alcohol.On that point I agree - he is being a responsible parent - and he has his eyes WIDE open. While some of you interpreted it this way, many of you chose to go down another road -one which I found to be very negative and judgemental.
    Like I said earlier - wow ...
     
  10. Mary Jayne

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    My son with D is 24 and we have had the lows associated with alcohol. I dread to think what might have happened if we had not been honest and approached the topic. The nurses at the clinic (and it is a teaching, children's hospital) started discussing the problems associated with drinking and D when he was 15. They continued to discuss this at all his appointments thereafter. We did not condone underage drinking or buy alcohol for any of our children, but we did pick them up anytime they phoned. Alberta has many ads on radio and tv stressing that parents should pick up their children that have been drinking without judgement. Safety comes first. (for them and other innocent people who may be on the road)

    Discussing the issue of underage drinking is no different than discussing birth control with my children. Discussion of the topic and being prepared is not the same as encouraging the activity.

    BTW, Alberta's legal drinking age is 18, we do have private liquor stores that are opened to all hours, and you are not kicked out of university if you are caught drinking. When I attended university, there was a pub in the residence and many more within walking distance on campus. (and that was in the dark ages!)

    And what became of that underaged drinker? He is an exercise physiologist with his Bachelor of Phys Ed. He is a bodybuilder and because his body is a temple,he doesn't drink alcohol. There is hope!
     
  11. Becky Stevens mom

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    My CWD is a bit young yet for drinking ( Damn, I hope so!) But I was bringing booze to school at age 13 to share with my friends who would bring theirs in. Back then, it was hidden, and it was abused. One of my friends was an alcoholic by the time she was 16. I think alot of that was because it was hidden, it was taboo, it was something to be ashamed of. Gosh! just like sex!

    I want to be open with my kids about drinking and about sex. I want them to trust me and feel that they can talk to me. I think your plan is spot on Wilf. You and your wife have given her the tools to live. Now you want to let her use them with the your help. She will learn to trust you and your wife. But most importantly, she will learn to trust herself and have a much easier time telling her friends that one or 2 drinks is enough and not feel as if shes gotta get wasted because its cool to do the hidden and taboo thing
     
  12. C6H12O6

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    I think the difference is an adult enabling a minor vs. a minor making the decision independently. I am not saying I agree CAS should be involved I just cautioned that I would not be forthcoming with this information to the medical team bc he might not be happy with the outcome.

    Alcohol is nothing but problematic with type 1 diabetes from my experience, the downside outweighs the upside. Maybe I am just sensitive to alcohol, but it was nothing but a problem for me even with minimal consumption.
     
  13. wilf

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    Hey kiddo. I know you're wanting to give good advice, but you can give it a rest here.

    I'm not enabling a minor - I'm making sure she is safe. I'm not ethically conflicted - I'm confident that I'm doing the right thing. And I'm not crying for help, subconsciously or whatever - I'm man enough to ask for help if I need it.

    Your own personal issues and negative experiences seem to be playing into your posts, which is something you want to avoid when giving advice on medical issues.

    You've got some more learning to do before you start your life's work as a health professional. A lot of issues that seem black and white right now based on what you've learned at school so far, will become much more complicated with subtle shadings of grey once you start work in the real world..

    Keep an open mind. And good luck! :cwds:
     
  14. Bigbluefrog

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    I am glad you posted this!

    I was wondering what happens with alcohol consumption...so most who drink will have a low blood sugar, because of the impact on the liver being too busy processing the alcohol.

    My daughter is almost 17, she is not drinking.

    Always stress no drinking and driving....we will pick you up, no questions asked.

    Now I see from this ....also add night checks.
     
  15. nanhsot

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    Yes, but the low is often many hours (up to 8) later, not immediately, so watch carefully for a while.
     
  16. LJM

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    Thank you for the good explanation of what alcohol does and what makes it risky (albeit a manageable risk, mostly). We are not quite there--but it is nice to be armed with some ideas.

    I especially like the open communication that some of you parents seem to have with your older teens.
     
  17. Brenda

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  18. missmakaliasmomma

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    Honestly, I can't see being ok with my dd drinking at 16. Not all kids drink. My husband and I didn't drink through hs, only when we turned 21... You don't have to let her drink because her friends are doing it. You're her parent, it's illegal, I think it's pretty clear. Whether you think it's fine that you're doing it or not, it's illegal. You could get in big trouble for enabling her to drink.

    Maybe a sip here and there is fine but alcohol is not good for diabetics, ever.
     
  19. Joretta

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    My daughter was taught information on drinking at 14 at the friends for Life conference. I was shocked they taught her so young. But I found out later she needed it as she had snuck a drink before then. I just happened to get up and test her that night too.
     

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