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Is your D child "normal"?

Discussion in 'Parents Off Topic' started by sam1nat2, Oct 25, 2010.

  1. sam1nat2

    sam1nat2 Approved members

    Jan 24, 2007
    I'm not wanting to start anything......

    I keep seeing these FB posts about D kids having ONE wish and for that to be for a cure, to be "normal"

    While I"m not a fan of D, I also don't spend time thinking about a cure very often. Of course I'd love it, don't get me wrong, I just don't dwell on the fact that its not here yet.

    Sam thinks of himself as a normal child. He's an exceptional athlete, a great student, goody goody child (whose never been grounded:eek:) who happens to have D. We talk about how everyone has challenges---some physical, some social, some have learning disorders, etc. D is his.

    I just can't bring myself to post something like that on FB because honestly if Sam had one wish I'm sure it would have something to do with playing catch with a pro athlete or something along those lines. He just doesn't talk about wanting a cure.

    Are there other kids who are like this? I realize he may be the exception, he's really had a pretty easy go of D--never hospitalized, only once has ever had a trace of ketones. His thinking may be different if he had a more dificult time.

    I suppose its all perspective, just wanting a few others perspectives
  2. kimmcannally

    kimmcannally Approved members

    Feb 28, 2010
    My D child is not normal, but he has other issues (Autism Spectrum and Anxiety Disorder) and has had those all his life. So I can't imagine what it would feel like if he had been normal before D. If my DD got D (God forbid) I would still think of her as normal.
  3. valerie k

    valerie k Approved members

    Feb 19, 2008
    for matt-normal would probably not ever testing again and not having to use insulin. To be just like the rest of the "normal" world that can eat without ever a thought.

    does he wish for a cure, Im sure he does, he just isnt vocal about it.

    I just asked matt (11) he wishes he gets all the videos on his Christmas list.
  4. Sarah Maddie's Mom

    Sarah Maddie's Mom Approved members

    Sep 23, 2007
    Well, FB is no bastion of brilliance. :rolleyes:

    So much of what people post is... questionable.

    Don't let it bother you. :cwds:

    And, yes, fwiw my D kid sees herself and is seen by others to be perfectly, "normal".;)
  5. lisanc

    lisanc Approved members

    Dec 22, 2009
    I am with ya' ... Maddie sees herself as normal and I explained it the same way ... we all have our challenges, diabetes is yours ...

  6. Flutterby

    Flutterby Approved members

    Nov 11, 2006
    Kaylee is 'normal' (whatever that is! ;)) But if she had one wish, it wouldn't be to rid of d, it would be to get rid of celiac.
  7. frizzyrazzy

    frizzyrazzy Approved members

    Dec 23, 2006
    yeah, I'm right there with you. Not to say that there aren't kids like that, but Ian never verbalizes his desire for a cure, other than to express how it effects him personally (when there is a cure, I'm going to take this pump and stomp on it) He thinks of himself as perfectly normal - with diabetes. He also has almost no desire to hang out with other people with diabetes - usually his response is "why do I need to do that?" Yet, he likes D camp and understands why D camp is a good thing.

    I am not trying to belittle a child who can think wide range like that, but I don't think it's all that common.
  8. Heather(CA)

    Heather(CA) Approved members

    Jun 18, 2007
    Both we and our boys have a lot in common:cwds:
  9. Jessica L

    Jessica L Approved members

    Oct 9, 2010
    Well having D is not normal when you didnt before. As a parent poking your finger and squeezing blood out of it isnt normal. Having to stick needles into your body daily isnt normal. Compared to her typical peers. However a parent letting their anger about their feelings towards D or anything affect their kids in my book isnt normal. My one wish for her is for a cure to come now or very very soon. Its not my only wish tho and its not even at the top of my list for her. I want her to grow up happy well adjusted and be able to live on her own with her own family one day. She CAN do that with D. So while I am pissed she is diabetic and I hate it for her she will never know it. If she did she wouldnt be normal and she is a normal girl with D but I dont think anything about D is normal. lol I hope someone gets that.
  10. TheFormerLantusFiend

    TheFormerLantusFiend Approved members

    Sep 10, 2006
    A Mother's Prayer

    There's that really cure focused song, where the mother and son are singing. I think the way it describes his hopes for himself and his mother's hopes for him are pretty accurately the way that people with disabilities tend to have their hopes vs what their parents are thinking. It's not that the kid doesn't know diabetes can do awful things. It's just that he's not focusing on that. He's not seeing himself as defined by diabetes- which is not to say that it's not important to him. But it's not taking the number one slot in his thoughts. I think people describing it as their kids' top wishes are exaggerating and/or projecting.
    I find it odd that people describe their kids or themselves as normal, diabetes or no diabetes. I mean... aren't you supposed to think your kid is different in some wonderfully amazing unique ways? Even before I was diagnosed with anything, I didn't think I was normal.

    Anyways, he sings,
    "When people ask me what I wish for,
    I find it hard to say.
    There are so many things I dream of, hope for,
    on any given day.

    I want to be an NBA star,
    I wanna have my own rock band.
    I wanna be in movies, star on TV,
    hold the whole world in my hand.

    But if you ask my mom,
    about just what she wants for me,
    she'd smile and sigh,
    with a tear in her eye, and this is what she'd say to me..."

    and then the mother and son sing,

    "I wish for you a long life,
    happiness and little strife
    healthy legs to take you where you want to go;
    strong eyes to see the whole world,
    strong heart to find the right girl,
    and a promise that God will help you live
    the life you're meant to lead."

    back to the kid,

    "My own dreams are simpler.
    I tend to focus on the fun.
    Eatin' candy, watchin' TV,
    not ansrin' to anyone.

    Maybe I'll be a doctor,
    and find the cure to all disease.
    Maybe I'll be president,
    and work to keep our country free.

    But if you ask my mom about just what she wants for me.
    She'd smile and sigh, try not to cry,
    and this is what she'd say to me..."

    I wish for you a long life
    happiness and little strife
    healthy legs to take you where you want to go
    strong eyes to see the whole world
    strong heart to find the right girl
    and a promise that god will help you live the life you're meant to lead.

    And he's solo again:

    "I heart my mother praying,
    in bed the other night.
    She said (duo), 'God please help my baby.
    Please make him alright.'
    She wished for me a long life,
    happiness and little strife,
    Healthy legs to take me where I want to go;
    Strong eyes to see the whole world,
    Strong heart to find the right girl,
    and a promise that God will help me live the life I'm meant to lead."

    Then she sings, alone:

    "That's a mother's prayer.
    A mother's hope.
    A mother's wish."
  11. Brynn

    Brynn Approved members

    Jan 17, 2009
    I HATE this term, I really hope I will not bring up an argument because that is not my intent. But what exactly is "normal" anymore? If I asked someone to define a normal family, could someone do it for the year 2010? In my opinion, there is no set "normal" anymore.

    So if you consider your child, happy and healthy, kuddos to you!!:)
  12. pianoplayer4

    pianoplayer4 Approved members

    Feb 13, 2010
    I think of my self as "normal" but I would love there to be a cure for this stupid disease. It's not cause I don't feel normal, it is because I want to stop thinking about bloodsugars and carbs and insulin. I want to be free of it I already am as normal as I was before d
  13. Mom2Will

    Mom2Will Approved members

    Oct 11, 2007
    Will says he wants a cure at every set change. Guess he remembers life without D in it, who knows. Glad he feels comfortable enough to verbalize it.
  14. Traci

    Traci Approved members

    Aug 10, 2006
    Nope. My son is not normal, he's amazing! He's smart and adorable and very charming, and I hope that one day he will use his powers for good and not evil. He has a draw to him that I can't begin to explain. He's hilariously funny and a sharp sense of humor that is more adult than child-like. If there's a show, he will be pulled on stage. If there's a performance, he will be one of the main characters. That's just who he is and it has nothing to do with d.

    As far as a cure goes, ds has zero interest. He says d is just a part of him and he even asked me if we didn't have to take the cure. I told him it would be his choice if ever a cure were discovered. (of course, I'd drag him in kicking and screaming to get cured if I had to, but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it!)
  15. Tricia22

    Tricia22 Approved members

    Jun 30, 2008
    My aunt who was like my second mom always said, "It's good to be weird because normal people are boring." I live by that.
  16. mom24grlz

    mom24grlz Approved members

    Mar 30, 2010
    I had to laugh at the title is your child normal LOL! Yeah i think Ashleigh is pretty normal. She hangs out with her friends, fights with her sisters, does everything an 11 year old girl does. She just does it with diabetes. We don't talk about a cure, and honestly i don't really spend all my time and energy worrying about one. Another poster said their child was amazing. I think the same thing every time Ashleigh gives herself a shot or checks her BS. I don't know if i could do that, and she does it multiple times a day.
  17. Becky Stevens mom

    Becky Stevens mom Approved members

    Oct 14, 2008
    Awhile ago we were somewhere where there was a wishing well. Steven threw in a coin and silently made his wish. I asked what he had wished for thinking that it would be a cure for diabetes. His reply "I wished for thousands of illegal fireworks;)" (Steven loves fireworks! and dreams of being a professional pyrotechnician when he grows up) I asked why he didnt wish for a cure for diabetes and he said, nah, I'd rather have the fireworks right now:cwds: He's had diabetes so long now he honestly doesnt know what its like not to have it and doesnt seem to let it over shadow what hes got planned I suppose. I too have seen these FB posts. They were originally posted for cancer patients
  18. cockatiel

    cockatiel Approved members

    Apr 25, 2008
    Is my dd "normal"? No -- but it has nothing to do with her diabetes and everything to do with the number of hours she practices the piano and organ each day! :D
  19. Kimby

    Kimby Approved members

    Jan 18, 2010
    Oddly enough, when Andrew was first diagnosed, he was afraid of a cure. He was so needlephobic and he was certain it would be a really long needle! Then he had a friend who underwent a bone marrow transplant. The friend was really sick & had to stay away from everyone for a year. Now, he is completely cured. That's when Andrew began to understand what a cure would mean. He said once that it wasn't fair that there wasn't a cure for diabetes. Diabetes has made him rather bionic, but other than that, he's "normal". His job is to do normal nine-year-old boy things, and my job is to figure out how he can still do them safely. On the other hand, I think D has warped my mind, and I might not be normal anymore...
  20. sam1nat2

    sam1nat2 Approved members

    Jan 24, 2007
    I can see this for a cancer patient!!! I see cancer as terrifying, as are other diseases. D sucks, it has made me gray (yes, I'm vain;)) bags under my eyes, but I'll take it any day in that with insulin and constant checking, we lead relatively normal lives. "normal" for us meaning what it was like before D.

    Becky I had to laugh at the fireworks comment, Sam used to wish to be a monster truck driver, Natalie wished to loose a tooth.

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