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Getting mom to let you go somewhere...

Discussion in 'Teens' started by Izzi, Mar 28, 2014.

  1. Izzi

    Izzi Approved members

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    I've been nominated for a 3 day 2 night trip with 7 other students from my school to attend a leadership conference. It's a very high honor. My two best friends and another good friend are attending. The chaperone is a teacher who I know and my mom knows very well. I would love to go but it's about 3 hours from my hometown. I haven't told my parents because I know my mom won't let me go. I mange my diabetes very well (last a1c 6.5%) and am very independent except for night time checking. She doesn't even let me stay over night at friends..help
     
  2. mmgirls

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    Hi I am a mom, not a teen, and my girls are less than 10, but thought I would jump in and help you try to figure this out.

    First, how old are you?

    What is the game plan you have in your head to handle an multi overnight trip without mom? calling mom before bed to talk about your days numbers/activityies and then setting an alarm to wake at a certain time to check on BG and to call mom? Do you want to handle everything without calling home? do you want to have your chaperone involved a little or not at all?

    These are all things that you need to think of and consider and have reasons for or against when you go to ask for permission.

    Is this a school sponsored activity? Do you have a 504 at school?
     
  3. Izzi

    Izzi Approved members

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    I'm 16. I plan on doing my everyday routine like I do at school (I don't text my mom my numbers) but I would text her my overnight numbers and breakfast and before bed and any number she would want to know. I would defiantly call her to chat. The chaperone wouldn't have to do anything, just be there if I needed her (and I know she would. She's a wonderful person) iIts school sponsored kind of but it's in the summer. I have an Iep not a 504 because I had an Iep for gifted education before I was dxd.

    (And I really appreciate moms/dads/parents replying because it helps me understand what you think)
     
  4. kiwikid

    kiwikid Approved members

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    Write out a game plan and present it to her - cover every question that you think she'll ask and then see how you go. You won't know unless you ask... be Positive !
     
  5. morningstar

    morningstar Approved members

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    I am 41, but was diagnosed at age 5, and spent many, many nights away from home (first one was 3 weeks post diagnosis), and left home for good at age 17 (I had finished school and was working during my gap year before uni - I lived with my BFF and we had a ball).

    I would ask your mum to consider what will happen in "less than 2 years" when it's time for college or university. It's time to start transitioning to adulthood right now! Obviously you are clever and responsible, maybe to help mum adjust, you might start doing some of your own night time testing? Maybe?
     
  6. KatieSue

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    I agree with presenting her with a thought out plan and what you would do. Ask her what exactly her concerns would be for anything not included in the plan. Good luck!
     
  7. rgcainmd

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    It sounds like this leadership conference is something for which you were selected due (at least in part) to your hard work. It would truly be a shame if you were not allowed to attend. My advice is to follow everyone's suggestions listed thus far and maybe consider showing your mother this thread. If you were my daughter, I would be so proud of you and would view this as the perfect opportunity to begin transitioning towards your own independent diabetes care. Good luck and let us know what ends up happening!
     
  8. MomofSweetOne

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    What are your nights like? Do you wake to your lows? I'm just asking because our nights in the past year have been much worse sometimes than ever before with hormone drops, and my daughter neither feels her lows during sleep nor wakes to her CGM. I imagine your mom will want/need to thoroughly talk to someone who will be aware of what to do and that they would be willing to call her if needed (the last thing I want to hear is a confident "I can handle this" from someone who hasn't ever lived with D - or equally bad is the "the hospital isn't too far away". I've done for a while now, and this year is when the nights have been terrifying to me on occasion. It may not seem like it, but the tough letting go is as hard on us as it is on you. We know that you want and deserve independence, and we try to give it at the same time as keeping you safe. It really stinks that the hormones that are making you ready to separate also makes D management so much harder.
     

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