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Dining out Disaster

Discussion in 'Parents of Children with Type 1' started by AmandaF, Jul 29, 2013.

  1. AmandaF

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    We went out to dinner on Friday night with another family and boy did I mess up.. lol There were a total of 5 little boys all between 5y/o and 8y/o so that right there should set the tone... HAHAHAHAHA

    I thought I was prepared. I had my Calorie King book, 3 different apps on my phone and a general idea of menu options for my son. My first mistake was going to the ladies room before ordering. I came back and both my boys already had a soda in front of them and my BFF took the liberty of ordering a ton of appetizers.....Cheese Fries, chips and salsa and fried mushrooms :eek: Now I am in no way upset with her..... She was doing our "NORMAL" routine, pre-diabetes..... At least she remembered my margarita... LOL I said to myself ok.... I think i can, I think i can, I think I can.....pulled out the book and apps and well..... I couldn't.... LOL

    My DH wasn't there yet (as he was meeting us from work) and he is my "math god"..... I got so overwhelmed between 5 boys acting like 5 boys do and all this food coming..... i could feel the tears coming and believe me I have been trying to hold them back for 2 weeks now.... the damn broke and I lost it..... right there during Friday Happy hour in a packed restaurant.... 2 weeks of all of the emotions that you feel right after DX. Right as the first tear fell my BFF realized what she had done and together we sobbed.... right in the middle of my most favorite local hangout in front of probably 100 strangers.... HAHAHAHA

    The staff quickly came over asking what was wrong, between wet, snotty sobs I tried to explain, the owner came over with a box of tissues and a hug, offered to take back all the food and start over.

    I finally stepped out side, pulled up my BIG GIRL PANTIES and tried to think. The only solution that I could come up with was this: I knew that Jake was going to have a boat load of carbs so I decided to give him 9 units of his novolog and then I would just correct him as needed...... GUESS WHAT????? It worked (kinda) lol..... It took until the middle of the day Saturday for his levels to stay steady in the range we needed him, but in the end it was all ok!!!!

    By the end of our dinner we were getting ready to leave and the manager came over and told us that our entire meal was on him. I told him that was not necessary and he told me that if he could add a little sunshine to a few dark days then Yes is was necessary...... People amaze me!!!!! There is so much good in this world!!!!!!!

    Sorry for the rant, but I just felt it was too comical and too sweet not to share!!!!!!
     
  2. mamattorney

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    Welcome to the world of "firsts" coming at you left and right. I think you did fine. Especially with table shared appetizers, all you can really do is try to think it through and then make an educated guess. How on earth are you (or he) going to know exactly how many cheese fries he's going to eat?

    I remember my "face palm" moment when we went out for stuffed pizza the first time after diagnosis. I thought I did everything right by going online and figuring out the carbs ahead of time. Then she ate the pizza and left the crust on the plate . . . like she does every time she eats stuffed pizza. I should have realized that and given her insulin for only half the carbs because she never eats the crust, but it never crossed my mind. Meanwhile I was scrambling and making her drink all kinds of Sprite to make up for it - I felt like a mad scientist trying to even things out.

    Of course, it all worked out eventually.

    But as you successfully tackle each "first", you'll feel that much more confident to take on the next "first".
     
  3. nebby3

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    Two weeks in that would be a huge mess to deal with! I think you did great. Frankly you are probably going to need to give up all the appetizers or at least make some choices. Shared food like that is tough to deal with with a bunch of grabby kids.
    I was pregnant when my dd was diagnosed and would always break down at my OB appointments because it was the only time I was without my kids and could let go. I think they thought I was a real mess but I just couldn't stop myself.
     
  4. Sarah Maddie's Mom

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    Good job. ;)

    Dn't get stuck thinking that you can only eat in chains with carb counts or the same foods over and over again. With practice you can cover most foods just by eyeballing them and it gets easier. :cwds:
     
  5. Pemb

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    Oh, that is so sweet it made me tear up. How kind of the staff and the manager. It gets easier...It really does.

    One day you'll realize that the carb counting and the math just seem like normal life. That is sad in itself, but so much easier.
     
  6. Charmed7

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    For what's its worth: I usually let my son eat his dinner and then bolus him for the food (unless his sugars are high before starting). It does help when hubby is there and we do the tally at the end of the meal and come close to the same number. But in the begining I would bolus him for the meal and forget about the dessert and have to bolus again. But this way we can eyeball the plate of french fries (minus the ones I steal) and anything he may have been too full to eat etc. It's not the best way, but when you only eat out a few times here and there, it's a much less stressful way of handling the meal. Especially with 5 boys! :D

    You did good!
     
  7. Beach bum

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    You did great!
    Have you tried the Figwee app? That's a good one.
    You definitely don't want to stop doing your outings, maybe change it up a bit. You can always bolus after and, I know it sounds crazy, but you can keep a tally going of what he has eaten.
    I think the managers gesture was very sweet, and it sounds like you have the support of a great friend.
     
  8. Noel

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    Good job Mama!

    Good job! In all honesty, in the grand scheme of things, it's one number, one meal. You did what needed to be done, your son had a good time, you had a good cry (which you probably needed anyway! :cwds:) and everyone is ok. Sometimes you just have to do exactly what you said, put on your big girl panties and give it a go, sometimes it will work out and other times it won't but at least you and your son are living life!
     
  9. Mommy For Life

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    I think you did a great job pancreas mama! A good cry in public sometimes just happens. You should have seen me in the cookie aisle shortly after my DD was dx... her teacher wanted to have the kids do a cookie exchange. I was a bawling mess thinking my kid was coming home with 32 cookies! Glad your BFF was there with magaritas and a shoulder! Yahoo for sweet restaurant managers. :cwds:
     
  10. Mish

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    you did great! Eating out is always challenging - not only are the carbs usually unknown but the fat in all restaurant food gets us every time and we've been at this for a lot of years. And still it's always a challenge to know if we got it right.

    But the thing is, you did something that was normal for your son and you - including the margarita and THAT is what is the most important thing here. You've set the tone, that life is going to go on, and each time after this is going to be just a little less stressful for you.

    And the margarita never hurts.
     
  11. quiltinmom

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    Not sure I completely agree with this one. The way I see it, if you know the carb count of most of his food, fudging the numbers a little bit on a part of the meal shouldn't cause any huge problems. At least, not enough to ruin your Friday night out. Remember--managing diabetes is about balance, not perfection.

    I think you did just fine! Your emotions are completely understandable. I think we hold back and hold back, then suddenly it hits at unexpected moments. Next week will be much better. :)

    Good luck!
     
  12. Mish

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    I missed this the first time I read though, but I agree with quiltinmom in her disagreement with nebby ;)

    It's more difficult on shots do handle apps, dinner, desert without doing multiple shots, but it's completely doable. But going out to eat while pumping is amazingly easy. That was one of our favorite things after pump start.
     
  13. cdninct

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    I think you handled things well, too! "Firsts" are stressful, but once they are over and done with, you have more experience for the next time!

    I agree with Noel's "One number, one meal" philosophy. I strive for good control for my son, but I am not going to avoid doing what he and the family enjoy doing to prevent a few bad numbers now and again.

    I also disagree about avoiding the appetizers. When we are in that situation, we dose before the meal for a reasonable number of carbs, then we keep rough tabs on what K is eating and bolus periodically. I thought maybe that would not work on injections, but we recently took an unplanned pump break, and I was surprised to find that K was more than willing to take an extra shot or two to keep up with his cousins with snacks or seconds.

    There will likely be a few things that you stop doing or do only rarely because they are not worth the headache, but in general, I would not let diabetes make decisions for your family!
     
  14. momof2marchboys

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    Don't get down on yourself over this and don't let your friend feel bad either - it will get better and you will notice how fast you pick up on how many carbs certain foods are worth - like we have decided that chicken nuggets are 5 carbs each - and have drilled in our sons head that if he wants pop it has to be diet pop and that if we are out to eat mom or dad has to take a sip first to make sure it is diet pop b/c let me tell you - servers mess up and bring regular coke instead of dt coke.
    We also do our insulin at the end of the meal as we don't know how much he is going to eat at each meal and it is not worth the fight to get him to eat more if we have given him insulin for a certain amount of carbs before he started eating.
    Another thing we have learned is the greasy foods, pasta, potatoes and pizza are foods that we need to hold off giving him all of this insulin upfront b/c they tend to cause a spike in his blood sugars about 2-3 hours after eating.
    Hang in there and you will start to notice trends over time and catch on to things quickly.
     
  15. Lizzie's Mom

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    Amanda, you did awesome :). Common sense will take you far in this journey, which is part science (and yes, math) and part art/gut/common sense. You did really well!

    The tears bit - yeah, it will hit you at some of the weirdest times early on. And that's okay. You're big-time processing a new reality in your son's life and in your family's life and mom, in YOUR life. As that new reality settles in and things become more familiar, your emotions will level out.

    And, as your son is a growing boy, you'll get things pretty much figured out, and then everything will change again! Just remember to be flexible and learn what you need to learn and let that common sense you demonstrated (once you pulled yourself together :eek:) be an integral part of his care.

    Hey - what restaurant was that? If it's a chain, I'd be happy to support a company that hires managers like that! He was awesome to comp the meal for you guys!

    Welcome, by the way. This forum was VERY helpful to me early on. Come with an open mind, a calculator, and at times a thick skin (folks do have differing opinions and perspectives here on certain issues). But it is a great resource that will help you with everything from evaluating BG numbers to how to best advocate for your child's needs (and you will at some point need to be an advocate). Tons of wisdom and experience here for you to draw from.

    May this journey be a peaceful one for you and your family.
     
  16. AmandaF

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    It was not a chain..... it was a local place that we have gone to a few times and now we will go much more... LOL

    Thanks so much everyone!!!!! I wondered about injecting him after his meals on occasion..... I was too scared I would kill him or something if I did... LOL

    I am amazed at how much I have learned in just 3 weeks!!!!! These forums sure do make me realize we are NOT alone...

    I just want to add that when we go out we normally don't get 3 appy's.... My BFF flew in to surprise me and give me much needed moral support..... It was a rare circumstance...... HAHAHAHAHAHA
     
  17. caspi

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    Amanda, you did great!!! I honestly was so afraid of eating out that I think it was close to 6 months after dx before I ventured to a restaurant that didn't have a carb count, lol. You handled things perfectly and like Mish said, the Margarita is always a plus! :D
     
  18. AmandaF

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    THANKS!!!!! I really do believe that a Margarita can cure all kinds of things.... :) hehehehe
     
  19. mom2Hanna

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    Amanda, I agree that you did great. First time out can be such a challenge.
     

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