Hello to everyone

[Shad's stepmom]

Hi, my name is Melody. I've been looking for a good support forum for parents of children with diabetes and ran across many but this place looks to be more my style. In our house we usually don't use the term 'step' for anything but decided on this forum it was necessary so that people might understand where I am coming from. If I sound too frustrated please understand..I adore this child ...I'm just tired.

I am step mom to Rashad, a 12 year old boy who was diagnosed when he was 7 with Type I diabetes. Until March of this year he lived with his mom but due to severe neglect, missing 70 days of school and being in hospital 20 times in 6 months due to missing insulin injections Child Protective Services stepped in and removed him from the home. They came to his father and I to ask if we would take him. The mom had lied and said the dad wasn't in the picture...he was when she allowed him to be...mostly for discipline :(. It's a long drawn out drama but we were given custody in March and have had Rashad in our home every since. His A1C level has dropped from over 13 down to 8.2 at last doc visit. He was underweight but has gained 20 pounds and is now average. I have worked my butt off to get him to a 'healthy' status but feel like I am losing the fight. His dad works and I am disabled so primary care is left up to me. His dad does what he can when he can and is a great help. However right now I am feeling quite overwhelmed so I decided I needed to find a support group before I completely snap. His levels have been bouncing between crashing as low as 30 to being almost in the 300's again :eek:. I know it's probably growth spurts and hormones but I'm exhausted with this roller coaster we are on.

There is a lot more to this story but it's very long detailed and sordid, one night stand type of story so I will leave that for another day maybe..if I just feel the need to vent..otherwise I'll keep it to myself for now. Don't wanna give you folks the wrong impression ;). Just to let you know a bit though...no one on his maternal side of the family has had diabetic training...no one..in 5 years of this child having this disease!!! He's been basically battling it on his own. Therefore, I never get a break ...he has been in close proximity of me since March. There is no one for us to leave him with for longer than a couple of hours and that is only when I leave him with my oldest daughter but she has 5 children of her own so she is stretched to the max as well.

Anyway I'm just glad to be here. I've been reading in the forums and see that I'm not the only parent dealing with ups and downs. Hopefully I will find my niche and possibly not pull my hair out :laugh:

Thank you for allowing me to join :).

[OSUMom]

Melody you are an angel!!!!!!!!!! What a loving step mom you are to your son. Care giving with this chronic illness is incredibly exhausting, and I'm so glad to see you've found CWD. This Web site has a great deal of information behind the scenes of the message board if you search around. The message boards and chat room are the best source of support. I hope you post often, and I hope you find this place a source of comfort and strength to help lift you up. We all need each other!!!

Welcome Melody!!!!!!! :cwds::cwds:

[Shad's stepmom]

Laurie, thanks for the welcome and the kind words but I am FAR from an angel. Let's just say I'm way past overwhelmed. My youngest child had only been gone from the nest for a year and a half. I'm having feelings that I do NOT like. That is basically the reason I am here...not only to learn more about this disease but also to help me get over some of these horrible feelings. I am a Type 2 diabetic so I already knew a little but I control mine with diet. Type 1 and being insulin dependent is a totally different ball park, much less game ;).

Thanks again for the warm welcome :).

[coni]

Welcome from a fellow Tennessean. You may not be an angel, Melody, but you're doing the right thing, and that's more than some will do.

Congratulations on getting Shad's a1c down. Hopefully things will settle down a bit. It may not mean that the "numbers look good"; it may just mean that you learn how to deal with the curve balls thrown at you and gain confidence that you're doing what needs to be done. It's exhausting sometimes to care for a CWD and then there's the rest of life to deal with!!

Again, welcome, and I hope we hear from you more.

[Shad's stepmom]

Hi Coni :).

Beautiful little girl you have.

Yes it's been stressful but finding this forum has helped more then even I thought it would. I'm learning so much ...esp about fluctuating levels and such. It really helps to be able to talk to those who have been there before.

Hope to talk to you more soon.

[StillMamamia]

Hi Melody,

Welcome to our community. Post any questions you have or just vent away. We know what it's like.

Rashad is very lucky to have you now looking out for his well-being. As overwhelming as it seems, you will gain strenght and knowledge. We're here for you.

Dad is welcome too!

[Shad's stepmom]

I truly have to thank everyone of the members here. This forum has literally saved my sanity. I felt myself slipping ever so close to a nervous breakdown *been there, done that during my divorce*. I was a mess when I found this place. I was crying ALL of the time..having angry outbursts that even though I tried to control them...I made a 'booboo' outta myself :o. I would hide out in my room so that Shad would not see me in that state. Of course he knew something was awry but I tried to keep as much of it from him as I could. I was sooo overwhelmed and felt horribly trapped. I had began to literally HATE diabetes...I felt like it was controlling our lives. I had no one to vent to. No one that really understood anyway. Since coming here I'm much more centered...much more clear headed. From reading posts from all of you I realize...yes diabetes is a horrible demon...but not one that can't be worked around. It just takes planning and patience. And NOOO his levels are NOT going to be perfect 100% of the time. With him being 1/3 of the way thru puberty I'll be lucky to see his levels within range 75% of the time :rolleyes:. I've resolved to being happy as long as he isn't crashing or going over 275 and staying there. And honestly I think my nervousness had/has an impact on him. I think if I'm upset he can sense it...and it upsets him sooooo....up go those numbers.

I'm still learning...as it seems we all are. YDMV is ever so true. All I want is for him to be healthy and happy. And I'm doing my best to be sure he is both. Thank you all for listening to my woes. I know I will have more but I also promise to be there for others as often as possible.

You folks are awesome :D

[Connie(BC)Type 1]

Welcome

You sound like a great mother(like all the parents and gr'parents here of course) Keep up the good work, and keep in close contact with his endo team, you , need their support as well, as Ellen would say, no question is studid!

[Caydens_Mommy]

i haven't had the chance to come and tell you welcome to the boards yet, so WELCOME!!


I too was like you ready to throw the towel in on many things before finding this place, D was tearing my world apart, but since finding CWD I have not seen nearly as many of those days.. It really helps to talk with people who get it.. Not just pretend to get it.. And I think you are pretty awesome for taking on such a huge responsibility of a child who is not actually yours.. He will love you till the end for that..