Touchy subject, but it's one I worry about

[Brensdad]

I am not the violent type. Not at all. And I also am not combative when I am low, either. But what if that changes one day? What if I am low, and I become combative with my wife? What would she do? I am much bigger than her, and she obviously couldn't do much with me if I were combative.

I don't think I would ever cause anyone any harm under most circumstances, but that kind of thing bothers me. I'd be interested to hear from the wives of the diabetics on this one.

[munchkingirl]

Well, being as I'm the diabetic one I don't have personal experience - but my grandfather is also a T1 diabetic and does become combatant when low, my grandmother is a fairly small person as well and although has ended up on the ground a few times, has never been hurt. That said, my grandpa is still on an "old" insulin regimen of NPH and Regular, so ends up with lows quite frequently and often before he knows it he's wandering around work not knowing what he's doing or anything. His endocrinologist sucks, to be quite frank. Every time I've been with my grandpa he thinks I'm being "bad" because I'm eating "normal" foods, until the most recent time with him I taught him about the insulin pump and CGMS systems and he is going to look into it - Definitely a good candidate for one.

I'd think that if this ever became a "real" (as if it's not real enough as it is :rolleyes:) concern for you, you and your wife are quite knowledgeable and would likely be able to get a CGMS or something of the like for you. :) Not that this is a fixall, of course.

I do wonder about this as well, considering this does happen to my grandfather, could it happen to me as well? We'll see.

[kel4han]

I remember my Dad and his serious lows when I was a child, he was normally a very angry man, always cussing and complaining or talking harshly to someone. But when low he was just quiet and kinda silly. Hopefully that helps :confused:

[funnygrl]

I've also never been combative with a low, but fear it. I especially fear it because my immediate family doesn't take diabetes seriously at all, and I'd be afraid that if I were low and combative they wouldn't realize I was low and think I had gone nuts and call the cops or something. Amy's a smart woman, and I'm sure she would know better than that.

If I get low enough that I'm not thinking straight, I'm usually pretty weak too.

[Nancy in VA]

Well, just arm her with a glucagon and a rubber mallet to smack you upside the head with, and she'll be ok :)

Honestly, don't have any advice but maybe you can have a good male friend who lives nearby "on call" to come and wrestle you if she calls and you are really combative. And maybe a room where she can lock herself in with the kids if she's really worried.

[Lee]

My ex- step-dad is combative when low - to the point of giving my mom a couple of black eyes and cracked ribs...

He is on NPH and does not have glucagon. My mom would have to sit on him and poor soda down his throat. He never remembered afterwards.

I would talk to him and my mom constantly about good testing (he only tests rarely) the importance of not going to bed under 100, and glucagon.

Towards the end of their marriage - she would call someone over to help...

Oh, and that isn't why their marriage ended either!

[BrendaK]

Well, just arm her with a glucagon and a rubber mallet to smack you upside the head with, and she'll be ok :)

Honestly, don't have any advice but maybe you can have a good male friend who lives nearby "on call" to come and wrestle you if she calls and you are really combative. And maybe a room where she can lock herself in with the kids if she's really worried.

Having a male friend (who is bigger and stronger than you) who is on call is great advice. 911 is always a phone call away!

Growing up, my mom would be super combative when she was low. She was like an angry drunk who would REFUSE to eat anything!! But, she is a very tiny and petite 110 pound woman, so my dad was obviously able to handle it.

Her lows have mellowed out over the years. Now you just tell her to test her bs and she needs to eat and she does. But it was quite a different story 10 years ago.

[lilituc]

I don't know if I really have any advice to offer, but I've been on the other side of that. I think the problem for me was that 10 minutes after it was over (because bg came up), the other person was totally fine. I was really shaken and upset about what had happened, and they were completely unable to deal with that, just wanted to change the subject and talk about something else. I may have even still been in shock.

So for me I'd say that at least some acknowledgement of what happened would be better than that. Yes, it's not your fault, yes, you can't control it, and yes, it's hard to talk about, but if it happens, it happened. It was a scary and uncertain time for me for awhile, but I think it was the other person's inability to discuss it at *all* that made it take so long for me to get over it. It hasn't happened again, though.

[momandwifeoftype1s]

My husband is not a combative or abusive man, but when he is dangerously low he is very intimidating and scary because of his size (6'4", 275 lbs.) and stubborn temper. I've had to call 911 a few times because I was scared emotionally and physically. There is no way I could come anywhere near him with a glucagon when he is low. I'd end up getting the injection or worse. It's not his fault, and I understand that. I live close to my parents so they can help me too. Educating your wife about your wishes in an emergency is a big help. What do you want her to do if you are low? Tell her ahead of time and have contingency plans in place. If you are a certain number, call 911? If you are not responding and acting drunk? Train her how to test your blood sugars and ketones if she's willing. Have all your physician phone numbers and lists of medications and dosages and times of dosages posted inside your kitchen cabinet (EMS asks for that info). I hope you never have to go through this with your family - it stinks!

Amy (wife and mom of type 1s)

[blessed]

I don't get mean when I am low I just get...so hot that I start taking off my clothes! Yes, that can be a bit embarrassing. Luckily I am normally with someone (a friend or my teen kids) and they remind me that it is just my "low" and that it isn't really hot in there! Yep, laugh all you want! It is pretty funny, but in the same token it would be disgusting to see this pasty, white fat woman naked in the freezer section of COSTCO! Crazy stuff we do when we are having a low...lol

[ange_mom]

Dennis rarely gets combative, but has. I've been pushed around a time or two. I've put him in a headlock and poured juice down his throat.
Now I just wait for him to get a little lower and he mellows out. There seems to just be a point where he is nasty and if I ride it out a little he will drink. The sad part was that David saw the last time he was low and I was being forceful in his need to drink the juice. It upset him. I explained later that when daddy is low, sometimes he doesn't want to eat and I need to make him.
I tend to be forceful when he is low and I wonder if that makes him react the way he does. His sister can sweetly make him drink juice no matter how angry he is...
I imagine that Amy's responses to your lows contribute to how you respond. She seems like the sweet gentle type...
I, on the other hand, sometimes get angry with the low, especially when it is every Saturday morning after eating oatmeat :eek: I would think he would learn!
If you haven't been that way before, I wouldn't worry, you probably won't be. Dennis runs the gamut of being angry, tired, silly, nasty, goofy. It's a shame about the silly part, because every time he is silly, the people close to him ask him if he is low....
Anyway... My advice to Amy would be to wait a little longer (although that is scarey) or call 911.

[robbslilangel]

My friend is a VERY big guy (almost 7ft). He is very sweet and noncombative. He had a low and thought everyone was out to get him. His wife called 911 and it took 4 cops and handcuffs to subdue him in order to receive a glucagon shot. That was the only way his wife could help him. I suggest calling 911 to help her treat you if you get too combative for her. After all, that is what 911 is for.

I, on the other hand, am an average person. My husband told me that he had to sit on me to help me with a low. I have also punched people trying to help me. I am very worried about what would happen if i had a bad low while i was alone with my kids.